This, That, and the Other

I am unofficially participating in this year’s A to Z Challenge. My theme this year is girlfriends.

J is for Judy B.

When I first met her, she was my boss’ secretary. She was a tall, blue-eyed blonde and she was a sight to behold. The first time I met her she literally took my breath away and my boss pulled me aside and told me she was married and just returned from maternity leave after having twins. “Steer clear, son,” my boss warned me. And I heeded his advice.

Until about two years later. I had a different job within the same company and a different boss and I ran into Judy in the company cafeteria. She seemed genuinely happy to see me and when I asked her how her twins were doing, she answered by telling me that she and her husband had separated. She suggested that we get together for dinner that night.

We went out to dinner a few more times and our relationship quickly evolved. I would stay over at her place after our dates because she had to get back to pay and relieve her babysitter and then I’d leave early in the morning before her twins got up. While we were dating, the song “Suite: Judy Blue Eyes” from Crosby, Stills & Nash was released and I would call her my Sweet Judy Blue Eyes.

Things were going great between us until one night I was over at her apartment and there was a knock at the door. Judy looked through the peephole and saw that it was her mother-in-law. Judy told me to go hide in the bedroom. I didn’t understand why she wanted me to do that. She and her husband were separated, but she didn’t want his mother to see me in her apartment. So she literally pushed me into the room and shut the door.

I was pissed and after about 15 minutes of sitting on her bed stewing, I decided to leave. I quietly opened up the slider that led from her bedroom onto a back patio and slowly closed the slider. I turned around to leave and I ran into her estranged husband, who was sitting on her patio wall smoking a cigarette. Before I knew it, this guy, a biker in a gang, was all over me, fists flying. He pretty much beat the living shit outta me.

I decided then and there that my days of being a backdoor man were over and I never went out with Judy again. I think she and her biker husband eventually got back together again. So much for my Sweet Judy Blue Eyes.

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