“I bought the place because I want to keep it simple. I want to create a Bed & Breakfast that would offer real country comfort, you know what I’m saying?” Ted said.
“That sounds nice,” Ted’s cousin Mike said. “Do you believe you have the talent, though, to pull it off?”
“At the risk of sounding bell￼icose,” Ted said, “I will stop at nothing to pull it off.”
“Interesting,” Mike said. “By the way, I looked at the town inspection report on the property and there are some flagrant code violations, including a leak in the septic system that could be harmful to the ground water.”
“Yeah, yeah, that’s going to be a major expense,” Ted admitted, “but on the brighter side, once all of those code violations are resolved, I’m going to have the best B&B in the state.”
Written for Jim Adams’ Thursday Inspiration prompt, where the word “brighter,” and the image above, are the prompts. Also for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (simple), Ragtag Daily Prompt (country comfort), Word of the Day Challenge (talent), Your Daily Word Prompt (bellicose), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (flagrant), and MMA Storytime (harmful).
“You need to get out of here immediately,” the store owner said. “With all of this nonsense, you’re putting the customers of my establishment in jeopardy.”
“Oh come on, dude,” Mike said. “This whole impromptu flash mob thing is driving traffic into your store. You should be thanking me.”
“Thanking you?” the store owner said. “Your friends are swarming into the place like a bunch of pesky insects. You need to get your mob out of here before I call the police.”
“That’s cold, dude,” Mike said. “We’re just trying to have a good time and to entertain your customers. But I know when I’m not welcome, so don’t call the cops. I’ll gather my pals and we’ll trundle on outta here.”
Written for these daily prompts: Word of the Day Challenge (establishment), MMA Storytime (jeopardy), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (impromptu), Ragtag Daily Prompt (insect), The Daily Spur (cold), and Your Daily Word Prompt (trundle).
“Sir, tobacco use is not permitted in this facility,” the nurse said, pointing to the sign.
“But the building is empty,” Clyde said.
“Au contraire, sir,” the nurse said. “We have some patients in the adjoining ward who have pneumonia and are using oxygen, which is very flammable.”
Clyde took a long drag on his cigarette and exhaled the smoke directly into the nurse’s face. “Is that a fact?” He said sarcastically. “Well, let me cogitate on this a bit more.” Then Clyde once again took a deep drag and blew the smoke in the nurse’s face.
A few hours later Clyde woke up. He was lying in a hospital bed, one leg in a cast and elevated off the bed. Standing next to him was the nurse. “Where the hell am I?” Clyde asked, as pain shot from his leg and up his spine.
“You’re in the hospital in a bed with your leg, which is broken in two places, in traction,” the nurse said. “And I have some advice for you, Clyde. In the future, you should make sure the person in whose face you blow your cigarette smoke does not have a black belt in karate.
Written for these daily prompts: Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (tobacco), The Daily Spur (empty), Ragtag Daily Prompt (pneumonia), Your Daily Word Prompt (cogitate), and MMA Storytime (traction).
“I repeat, Captain, we must jettison the excess cargo if we are going to outmaneuver the Klingon warships,” Chekov said.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Chekov,” Captain Kirk said. “I have total confidence in our ability to defeat the Klingons. Ours will be a victory of truly memorable proportions.”
Unable to remain silent, Mr. Spock interrupted Kirk’s tirade. “As much as I admire your artistic battle skills, Captain, logic dictates that the odds are seriously stacked against us should we go into battle.”
Spock turned to the ship’s doctor. “Dr. McCoy, sedate the Captain immediately.” Then he said to Scotty, “Once the Captain is helpless, beam him off the ship and then jettison the excess cargo.” Spock then ordered Uhuru, “take us to warp speed and get us the fuck outta here.”
Written for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (repeat), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (jettison), Ragtag Daily Prompt (confidence), Word of the Day Challenge (memorable), and MMA Storytime (artistic).