This Is Not a Drill

Climate ChangeWhen will people finally awaken to the threat humanity faces due to climate change? How can they simply ignore the frequent “100-year floods” and larger, more intense hurricanes, the significantly hotter summers and colder winters? And what about the staggering increases in the number of devastating wildfires?

How can people close their minds and refuse to correlate climate change with greenhouse gasses and burning fossil fuels?

We are no longer living in the land of milk and honey, folks. There’s no cause for elation, especially if we, as a species, are unwilling to take actions that will slow the trajectory of the inevitable disaster that climate change poses.

This is not a hoax. This is not a drill.

Written for these daily prompts: Ragtag Daily Prompt (awaken), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (climate), Your Daily Word Prompt (correlate), The Daily Spur (milk), and Word the Day Challenge (elation).

Stop Staring at Women’s Tits

“This doesn’t make any sense to me,” Carl said. “We’d been exchanging message after message on that dating site and everything seemed great.”

“And now?” Carl’s roommate, David asked.

“Nothing but frustration,” Carl answered. I can’t reconcile her latest message with how we’ve been messaging before we finally met in person last night.”

“What did she say to you in her message about last night?” David asked.”

“She said she’s not interested in seeing me again.”

“Did you say or do something that she might have considered inappropriate or possibly even perfidious?” David asked.

“First, I don’t even know what that word means,” Carl said. “But she kept reminding me that her eyes were in her head,” Carl answered.

“Why would anyone have to remind someone that their eyes are in their head?” David responded. “Where else would someone’s eyes be?”
“I don’t know,” Carl said, “although she was wearing a really low cut blouse and I must admit that I had a hard time taking my eyes off of her tits. They were quite, shall we say, ample. Then she said something about my suffering from agastopia. Again, I have no idea what that is, but maybe I should go see a doctor about it. It might contagious.”

“No, I don’t think you need to see a doctor,” David said, “but you might want to improve your vocabulary and you should definitely stop staring at women’s tits.”

Written for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (message), Ragtag Daily Prompt (frustration), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (reconcile), Your Daily Word Prompt (perfidious), and Word of the Day Challenge (agastopia).

Okay, I know this post is a bit odd (i.e., bad), but so are words like “perfidious” and “agastopia” odd. I mean seriously, who uses words like those in everyday life? Go ahead, you try fitting both of those words into a single, reasonably coherent post and see if you can do any better.

Thursday Inspiration — The Catacombs of My Mind

“The butterfly leaves no footprint,” Todd said.

“Did you say something, honey,” Monica asked.

“I said…” Todd started to answer but then stopped himself. “Never mind. Just some random thought rattling around inside my head.”

“Ever since you got laid off,” Monica said, “you seem so introspective. You should get a hobby, do something with your hands.

“I like to hide inside my head,” Todd said. “With all of the crazy antics going on in the outside world, I’m loving spending most of my time wandering around the catacombs of my mind. It’s a fascinating place to be, and I’m discovering so much about who I really am.”

“Maybe you should start a blog,” Monica suggested. “That way you could share all of that fascinating shit rattling around inside your head with the rest of the world.”

“Great idea,” Todd said enthusiastically. “I’ll get started on it right away.”

Written for this week’s Thursday Inspiration prompt from Paula Light, where the theme is “butterfly.” Also for these daily prompts: Ragtag Daily Prompt (footprint), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (introspective), The Daily Spur (hide), Your Daily Word Prompt (antic), and WordPress of the Day Challenge (loving).

Carry Me Away

BreezeAs I lie upon my bed
My bedroom window open
I hear the din of the city
And I wish a zephyr breeze
Would pick me up
And carry me away
To a new terrain
To a distant land
Of peace and serenity
Although I suppose
No matter where I end up
I shall never escape
Being me

Written for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (bedroom), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (din), Ragtag Daily Prompt (zephyr), Word of the Day Challenge (terrain), and Your Daily Word Prompt (suppose).

The Catered Affair

“Okay, so the menu is set,” Dave said. “The guests will have their choice of beef, chicken, or vegetarian meals.”

“What about Uncle George?” Elaine asked. “He eats only fish.”

“This is not a game, Elaine,” Dave said. “We’re not adding a fish meal option to the menu just because of that eccentric, ichthyophagous uncle of yours. I’m telling you, we’re going to stay the course.”

“Oh, Dave, how difficult would it be to add a fish option? I’m sure there are other guests who might prefer fish,” Elaine said.

“Fine!” Dave said, throwing his hand up in resignation. “I’ll call the caterers and see what they can do to add a fish option. I just don’t want anymore turmoil.”

“Thank you, honey,” Elaine said, giving her husband a peck on the cheek.

“Anything not to have to listen to your incessant whining,” Dave said.

Written for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (game), Word of the Day Challenge (ichthyophagous), Ragtag Daily Prompt (stay), . Your Daily Word Prompt (turmoil), and Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (incessant).