The Age of Fertility

She always seemed to be so fastidious, and I must admit, I had a huge crush on her back in the day. But the last time I saw her, she looked uncharacteristically fat and flabby. Taken aback by her appearance, I was not very nice to her at the time, shaming her for how she let her body swell up like it did. But I immediately felt bad because at that encounter she became quite melancholy and began to cry.

I later found out that she was pregnant, not fat and flabby, and what upset her that day was not so much what I had said, as much as it was that her boyfriend abandoned her shortly after she became pregnant.

I was ashamed for what I said to her, and I have since instituted a new personal policy to never comment on a woman’s appearance, especially if a woman is of the age of fertility.

Written for these daily prompts: E.M.’s Random Word Prompt (fastidious), Ragtag Daily Prompt (crush), Your Daily Word Prompt (flabby), Word of the Day Challenge (shaming), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (swell), My Vivid Blog (melancholy), and The Daily Spur (policy).

And for the record, this post is pure fiction. I would never mistake a pregnant woman for a fat woman, but I admit that I once congratulated a woman on her pregnancy. She became very indignant when she informed me that she was not pregnant.

The Letter M

Deb, over at Nope, Not Pam, has this weekly challenge called A Letter a Week where she gives us a place, an emotion, an adjective, a verb, and an animal all starting with the same letter. Then she asks us to write a post using those items and the letter she has given us, which this week is the letter M.

Here are Deb’s M-words:

Place – Melbourne
Emotion – museum fatigue
Adjective – majestic
Verb – manifest
Animal – macaw

There was a robbery at a museum in Melbourne, Florida, where a colorful sculpture of the majestic macaw was stolen. Detective Morrisey was called to the scene and immediately came to the conclusion that the motive for the theft was museum fatigue.

“Let me explain,” the detective said. “It’s a condition that often manifests itself in long-term museum workers. They experience a feeling of languor, a weariness of body and soul. They often act out by doing something destructive directed at the cause of their malady. So my conjecture is that the culprit is likely a long-term employee of the museum.”

“Museum fatigue?” a surprised director said. “What is that? I’ve never heard of such a thing.”

“That’s ridiculous,” the museum director argued. “I can’t imagine any of our staff members stealing the macaw. While it’s a piece of art, it’s just painted plaster. Your conjecture, Detective, is rubbish.”

“And you, madam,” Detective Morrisey said, “will soon find that you intransigence on this incident will not serve you well. Based upon my aforementioned conjecture, my partner, Detective Ron Hayden, went to the home of your assistant director, Charles Farrington, who has worked here for twenty-five years, where Detective recovered the stolen macaw.”

Also written for these daily prompts: Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (robbery), The Daily Spur (conclusion), Ragtag Daily Prompt (explain), Your Daily Word Prompt (languor), My Vivid Blog (plaster), and E.M.’s Random Word Prompt (intransigence).

It’s a Wrap!

“Cut!” the director shouted. “I deem that the scene where the gremlin jumps out from behind the furniture and scares that poor little freckle-faced girl is a wrap. Good job everyone. Let’s take 15 before we start shooting the next scene.”

The director looked around the soundstage and bellowed, “I need a cup of coffee now and that tenderfoot craft services apprentice is never hereabouts when I need him.”

“Sorry sir,” a meek voice behind the angry director said. Handing the director’s mug to him, the kid said, “I know you’re a director, but there’s no need to make a scene over this. I went to get your coffee as you were wrapping up that last scene and I asked them to brew a fresh pot because I know how you like your coffee freshly brewed.”

The director grabbed the mug from the apprentice’s hand and walked away without so much as a thank you. The kid just stood there and softly mumbled “you’re welcome” under his breath.

Written for these daily prompts: E.M.’s Random Word Prompt (deem), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (scene), Word of the Day Challenge (gremlin), My Vivid Blog (furniture), The Daily Spur (freckle), Ragtag Daily Prompt (tenderfoot), and Your Daily Word Prompt (hereabouts).

Detective Story

As the half-light began to fade, Detective Morrisey realized that his investigation, at least for the day, would have to end. Tomorrow will be another day, he thought, as his stomach began to rumble from hunger, having not eaten anything since breakfast.

He knew that there were nuances to this case yet to surface, but if he kept at it, he was sure he could lay bare the relevant facts by knitting together all of the evidence into a solid, prosecutable case to hand over to the DA. Morrisey didn’t want to put his hard-earned reputation at risk by leaving any stone unturned. The ultimate disposition of this investigation required diligence, and he was bound and determined to eschew even a hint of failure.

So he’d go home, have some dinner, a beer or two, get a good night’s sleep, and proceed tomorrow where he left off tonight. Just turning another page in his personal detective story.

Written for these daily prompts: Ragtag Daily Prompt (half-light/hunger), Word of the Day Challenge (fade/reputation), My Vivid Blog (investigation/nuances/knitting), The Daily Spur (stomach/bare), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (determination/eschew/proceed), and The Twiglets (turning page).

Rainbow at Sunset

I found this photo from Suzanne Martin Gadrim on Pinterest and felt it would be a perfect illustration for two of yesterday’s daily prompt words: “pink,” from My Vivid Blog, and “rainbow,” from Ragtag Daily Prompt.

I watched it as it formed, a double rainbow, in front of a beautiful sunset sky of red, pink, orange, and violet. My wife and I were standing on the dunes overlooking the water caressing the shoreline.

My wife squeezed my hand. “This is stunning,” she said. “I am in awe. I cannot understand how you can witness something as magnificent as this and still deny the existence of God.”

“There’s nothing supernatural about what we’re looking at,” I said. “As to the colors of the sky, when the sun is low on the horizon at sunset, sunlight has to travel through more of the atmosphere to reach us. When the light from the setting sun hits the atmosphere, it is scattered, particularly when dust, smoke, and other pollutants are in the air. So by the time the sunlight reaches our eyes, there is generally more of the red and yellow parts of the spectrum, rather than the blue, that is visible.

“And rainbows are formed when sunlight enters rain droplets. There is a slowing down and bending of the light as it goes from air to denser water. The light reflects off the inside of the droplet, separating into its component wavelengths, or colors. When light exits the droplet, it makes a rainbow. See, nothing magical or mystical about it.”

My wife dropped my hand from hers and said, “Why are you always so damn logical all the time? You suck all the magic and wonder out of everything.” Then she turned around and walked away, leaving me standing there all alone.

Next time I think I’ll just say “Yes, dear,” to whatever she says. You know, happy wife, happy life.