Fibbing Friday — I Don’t Give a Duck

Frank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as host for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in our responses. Today is Di’s turn to host and here are her questions.

1. Where did the phrase ‘Out for a duck’ originate?

When I was a young man still living at  home with my parents, I used to use that phrase when I was going out on a date. My parents either knew what I really meant or they were afraid to ask.

2. What is Duck a l’orange?

It’s the brand name of Donald Trump’s makeup.

3. Why do we yell ‘DUCK’ when something is likely to hit us?

Because if we yelled “PIG,” we might get arrested.

OK, enough of the duck questions, Geraldine is getting nervous.
4. When was the first iPhone released?

It was released the year after the hPhone and a year before the jPhone.

5. What is an interrobang?

It’s when you go ‘out for a duck’ during the intermission of the play.

6. What is, or was, a Troodon?

It was the brand name of the first tampon brought to market.

7. Who invented the Little Black Dress?

A funeral director came up with the idea for something little girls could wear to funerals.

8. What is TikTok?

It’s the sound my clock incessantly makes when I’m suffering from insomnia.

9. Who invented the frying pan?

The Friar of Never Never Land from the story of Peter Pan.

10. What color is most toilet paper in France?

Blanc.

Fibbing Friday — Who, What, and Where

Frank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as host for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in our responses. Today is Frank’s turn to host and here are his questions.

1 – What do the abbreviations, B.C. and A.D. stand for?

They’re not abbreviations. It’s actually the name of an AC/DC cover band called BC/AD.

2 – What do the abbreviations, B.C.E. and C.E. stand for?

Badly Cooked Eggs and Corrupt Executive.

3 – What event triggered the start of the U.S. Civil War?

Donald Trump’s instigation of a siege on the U.S. Capitol building.

4 – What were “The Wars of the Roses?”

It was when the two florist shops on Main Street began lowering the prices of their roses in order to drive business away from the other shop.

5 – Where was the Kingdom of Prussia located?

In the town of King of Prussia, Pennsylvania.

6 – According to the account in Genesis, what happened at the Tower of Babel?

An earthquake turned the tower into rubble.

7 – What artistic style is Pablo Picasso famous for?

He used to create sculptures from the Pablum his mother would feed him, rather than eat the gross-tasting cereal.
8 – January 6th was two days ago. What makes it special?

It won’t happen again for another 363 days.

9 – In the comic strip, Calvin & Hobbes, who or what is Hobbes?

He was the funny one of the famous detective pair.

10 – The song, “Home on the Range” asks for a home where what two animals play?

Lions and tigers (and sometimes bears), oh my.

Fibbing Friday — New Year’s Day

Frank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as host for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in our responses. Today is Di’s turn to host and here are her questions.

1. Where will you find ‘One for his knob’ and ‘Two for his heels’?

Written on the wall of a stall in the men’s room.

2. Where will you find winks, squidgers and a target?

Also written on the wall in a men’s bathroom.

3. What is a numerator?

Someone who enumerates.

4. There are 206 in the human body. What are they?

Smells.

5. What can be waxing or waning?

Waxing is an unwanted body hair removal technique. Waning is a hair replacement technique for parts of the body where you want hair to grow but it doesn’t.

6. What is The Mystery Machine?

A machine with a purpose that has yet to be determined.

7. What was the Millenium Falcon?

It was a remake of the Humphrey Bogart classic movie, “The Maltese Falcon.”

8. What will you find inside a ping pong ball?

A smaller ping pong ball.

9. What is a fortress?

It’s the opposite of an aftress.

10. How many spots do newborn dalmation puppies have?

As many as you can draw on them with a Sharpie.

Fibbing Friday — Saturday Edition

Frank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as host for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in our responses. Today is Frank’s turn to host and here are his questions.

1. Why is there a small plastic baby inside of a king cake?

The queen wanted to surprise her husband, the king, to let him know she was pregnant, so she had the royal baker put the small plastic baby inside the king’s cake. Sadly, the king choked and died when he accidentally swallowed the small plastic baby, marking the first time in royal history that a fetus ascended to the throne.

2. What is Three Kings Day?

It’s the day I celebrate winning $1,000 at a Las Vegas poker tournament when I won with a hand of three kings.

3. Why is Boxing Day not formally observed in the US?

Because Americans are more interested in college football bowl games at this time of year than they are in watching two sweaty men slugging it out in a ring.

4. Traditionally, Christmas Day is the first of the Twelve Days of Christmas. By that same tradition, what is today known as?

The 16th day of Chanukah.

5. Why is the US Presidential Inauguration held at noon on January 20th?

To give the outgoing president time to wrap up the official business of his term. This year, it also provides ample time to fumigate the White House in order to rid it of Donald Trump’s stink.

6. Why are the President and Vice President of the United States elected together rather than separately?

Because when they take their oaths of office, it’s til death do they part. Or at least til the next election.

7. Who swears in the President of the United States?

The Court Jester.

8. In certain US states that have lots of prairie land, there are signs warning not to drive through smoke. Why?

Those signs were misprinted and have been recalled and replaced by signs that say, “Don’t Drive While Smoking Pot.”

9. Why did Air France and British Airways suspend the use of all Concorde aircraft in 2003?

The Concorde aircraft was suspended because it was causing major air pollution.

10. Why was there no supersonic replacement for the Concorde once all of them had been decommissioned?

Too many passengers lost their hearing when the planes reached supersonic speeds and broke the sound barrier.

Fibbing Friday — Fairytale Fibs

Frank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as host for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in our responses. Today is Di’s turn to host and here are her questions.

1. Why is a Pantomime thus called?

Because an old Italian guy was wandering around his small town without any pants on and he kept yelling, “Where are those pant o’ mine? I cannot find those pant ‘o mine.” People wanted him to shut up and stop yelling, so they invented a new way of communicating and, in honor of that old Italian guy frantically looking for his pants, called it “pantomime.”

2. Why was the White Rabbit late?

She was pregnant.

3. What happened when Aladdin rubbed the lamp for the first time?

He experienced his first orgasm.

4. How many ugly sisters were there?

Three. They were witches and sisters, often referred to as the Weird Sisters or Wayward Sisters. They were introduced in William Shakespeare’s Macbeth and were known for their chant, “Double, double, toil, and trouble / Fire burn and cauldron bubble.” They were very ugly.

5. What did Jack exchange for the magic beans?

A magic flute.

6. Why do they always shout ‘It’s behind you!!’

That’s the appropriate answer when someone asks, “Where’s my butt?”

7. What was the house in the woods made of that Hansel and Gretel found?

Magic beans.

8. Who owned The Mirror Mirror on the wall?

That was what Donald Trump shouted when he wanted to have his border wall clad with mirrors.

9. What was the name of Dick Whittington’s cat?

Tinkerbell

10. Who was Tinkerbell?

Dick Whittingon’s cat. Duh!