I am unofficially participating in this year’s A to Z Challenge. My theme this year is girlfriends.
X is for Xin C.
I bet you didn’t think I had ever gone out with a girl whose name started with the letter “X,” but you’d have been wrong. Xin was a Chinese girl that I went out with for a few months during my junior year in college. She pronounced her name like Sheen, but she anglicized it to Jean to make it easier on everyone else.
Xin (or Jean) was, like me, a first-generation American and her parents raised her and her sister in a very traditional Chinese manner. I met her parents once and was surprised that, although they could understand and speak English, in their home no one did. They all spoke Chinese all the time. Xin had started kindergarten in American schools, so her English was perfect with no hint of an accent.
I met Xin in one of my classes and thought she was about the most exotic-looking young woman I’d ever seen in real life. We talked a bit in class and I found out that she was a speech and communication major with a focus on broadcast journalism, which intrigued me. I spent a lot of time asking her about her life, her major, and her future. After a few weeks we started dating and for a time it was great. We would talk for hours and hours and she was one of the most interesting and intelligent girls I’d ever gone out with and I loved the time we spent together.
We seemed to be about equally attracted to each other and the physical aspect of our relationship added a whole new and exciting dimension. However, there were limitations imposed by Xin’s heritage. She absolutely would not have sexual intercourse until she was married. We did just about everything else a couple could do sexually without going all the way, but it still, in me, anyway, left something to be desired. I was feeling unfulfilled and I know she was too. But she was immovable.
I was a junior in college and admittedly immature, so I was nowhere near even contemplating marriage. But not being able to have sex with her was driving me crazy. One night we were naked in bed. I was on top of her and we were making out, and I could easily have penetrated her, but I suddenly realized that if I had, it would be tantamount to rape, and I wouldn’t be able be able to live with myself. So I stopped, got off of her, got dressed, told Xin to get dressed, and drove her home.
Xin and I remained friendly after that, but we never went out on a real date again. She said she understood why we had to stop seeing each other, but she confessed later on that she wanted me inside of her that night as much as I wanted to be, but she was glad that I stopped before it happened.
Previous 2024 A2Z posts: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W