Bathroom Humor

F5369ECA-4BEC-4FEC-B6E6-54785845B2A2“Hey Dave, you still in here?” Stan called out as he entered the men’s room. “Did you fall in or something, buddy? We’re gonna be late for the staff meeting.”

“Um, yeah, I’ll be right out,” Dave responded. “Give me a sec.”

“You okay, man? You’ve been in here for at least ten minutes.”

“Yeah, Yeah, I’m fine,” Dave said. Then the toilet flushed, the stall door opened up, and Dave walked up to the sink and started washing his hands.

“Damn, buddy, you look like the cat that just ate the canary,” Stan said. “What went on in there?”

“Okay, fine,” Dave said, “My wife texted me some some sexy pictures on my phone and, well, you know, I got a bit….”

“Say no more, buddy, been there, done that.” Stan said.

“Listen, Stan, you gotta promise not to tell anyone, understand?” Dave said.

“Don’t worry, buddy,” Stan said, “what happens in the men’s room, stays in the men’s room.”

“Ha! I would hope so,” Dave said, laughing.

Written for The Haunted Wordsmith Daily Prompt, where the setting is, “bathroom/washroom,” and the sentence starter is, “Did you fall in?”

Size Matters

D848FABA-DB45-4783-9C0E-80498B3C6983“You really made a mess of things, Igor,” Dr. Frankenstein said.

“Hey, it’s not my fault, dammit,” Igor objected. “Your instructions were too vague. You didn’t specify the size or age of the organ.”

“Oh my God, Igor, you always come up with some sort of scapegoat for your own mistakes,” Dr. Frankenstein said. “For once in your life, you need to take responsibility for your actions.”

“Listen, it’s not too late to make this right,” Igor said. “I’ll just go back to the morgue in the basement of the sanctuary and get another one. And this one will be even larger and better.”

“Good,” said Dr. Frankenstein, “because when I regenerate this corpse, I want to make sure his schlong is proportional to his eight-foot tall frame.”

Written for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (mess), Your Daily Word Prompt (vague), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (scapegoat), Word of the Day Challenge (sanctuary), and Ragtag Daily Prompt (regenerate).





scapegoat vague regenerate sanctuary mess

Like the Back of My Hand Challenge

When I read this post from Judy Dykstra-Brown this morning, which featured a picture of the back of a hand (hers? someone else’s?), I was inspired to take a picture of the back of my hand and post it.33E4D6E2-59B4-46F4-A59B-2B1FD4355F27And then I thought wouldn’t it be fun to challenge other bloggers to take a picture of the back of their own hands.

So take a picture of the back of your hand (or the front, or both) and create your own post featuring that picture. Go head, fellow bloggers, and show your hands.

Use the tag #myhand and link back to this post. Let’s see those hands of yours!

Three Line Tales — Endangered

A342801C-B143-48BA-B05C-B3FE4D8EC8EB“Get closer, kids, and take a good look at that majestic, beautiful animal,” Barbara’s and Dennis’ father told them, “because that species may not be around much longer.”

The two children stared in awe and amazement at the enormous polar bear swimming right up next to the huge aquarium’s thick glass wall, and Barbara asked her father why it wasn’t going to be around much longer.

“The sea ice where polar bears live is disappearing due to warming temperatures around the globe,” he explained, “which is the biggest threat to their survival, and if we don’t do something quickly to combat man-made climate change, these magnificent creatures may soon become extinct.”

Written for this week’s Three Line Tales from Sonya at Only 100 Words. Photo credit: Vidar Nordli-Mathisen via Unsplash.

50 Word Thursday — Her Room

14E14094-AA61-4F94-BB93-A9795F8CD253Jacob walked into her room. He could smell her fragrance even though she had been gone for nearly a week. He felt her presence and it was almost as if she were standing by her bed, her lips red and perfectly shaped, her cheeks blushed prettily when she spoke. 

He saw her mouth moving but no sounds were forthcoming. Jacob tried to read her lips and to understand what she was saying to him. He assumed she was telling him goodbye, that she loved him, and that she was sorry that she succumbed to the disease that left him alone.

(100 words)

Written for 50 Word Thursday, this week from Kristian at Tales From the Mind of Kristian. The challenge is to:

  • Find the muse within the photo and/or line provided and follow where it leads. It can be a story, anecdote, poem. Anything!
  • The story must be between 50 and 250 words, in 50 word increments. (so 50, 100, 150, 200 or 250 words)
  • Link back to Kristian’s post with the tag 50WordThurs so that everyone can find it, or post your response in the comments below.

There was no attribution for the photo provided, but the line, “Her lips were red and perfectly shaped, her cheeks blushed prettily when she spoke,” is from Neil Gaiman’s Stardust.