A Glutton By Any Other Name

9F1E3B59-329C-4376-AF99-50491D305F4CThe Uber driver showed up in a Nissan Cube, which was weird enough, I thought. But when I asked him to take me to the Plaza Hotel, I can only say that his reaction was one of anger. “Is there a problem?” I asked him.

He scratched his head and then picked up his copy of the local newspaper and pointed to an article about the hotel. “That place is a zoo today. There’s a big conference being held there of the world’s most renowned chefs, and the crowds are crazy. I can barely get within four blocks of the hotel without getting stuck in traffic for hours.”

“Get me as close as you can,” I said. “I’ll walk the rest of the way.”

“Are you some sort of gourmet?” the driver asked me.

I chuckled. “No, I’m more of a gourmand than a legitimate gourmet,” I said.

“What’s the difference between a gourmand and a gourmet?” he asked.

“A lot of people get those two words confused,” I said. “A gourmet is someone who knows a lot about fine food and drink and has refined tastes. He’s sort of an aficionado of high quality or exotic cuisines. A gourmand,” I continued, “refers to someone who is extremely fond of eating and drinking, often to excess. I call myself a gourmand because it sounds more positive than were I to call myself a glutton. But the simple truth is that I just really enjoy eating.”

“Well,” the driver said, “we all have the freedom to enjoy food, don’t we?”

“Yes, and that’s what I keep telling my doctor when he warns me to watch my weight every time I go in for my annual physical exam,” I said.

Written for today’s Three Things Challenge prompt from Di (Pensitivity101), where the three things are “anger,” “paper,” and “hotel.” Also for these daily prompts: Daily Addictions (cube), Ragtag Daily Prompt (scratch), Word of the Day Challenge (barely), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (gourmand), Your Daily World Prompt (legitimate, and The Daily Spur (freedom). Image credit: Georg Emanuel Opiz Der Völler 1804 from Wikimedia Commons.

Abandoning a Sinking Ship

C47CCC12-B837-4436-B363-7DEA45A9D310 NBC News White House correspondent Peter Alexander tweeted that a mouse “literally fell out of the ceiling” and onto his lap in the White House press room. Some reporters ran for cover, while others sought to corner the mouse and capture it. The rodent sneaked under the door into the main hall of the press area before it eventually ran into the briefing room, where reporters lost track of it.

The crisis within the Trump presidency has apparently reached the point that even the White House rodents are abandoning what most definitely appears to be a sinking ship. Here’s a special report just in from LSSC correspondent Bill Farber.

Also, you might be interested in the origin story behind Trump’s desire to build a moat in front of the border wall and stock it with alligators.

A True Friend?

Fortune cookie My wife and I had some Chinese food delivered for dinner the other night and we found this “fortune” in one of the complimentary fortune cookies included with our meals.

A true friend would rather be anywhere else? Seriously? I don’t think so. Yes, a true friend is, indeed, someone who is there for you, someone who has your back. But would someone who is a true friend rather be anywhere else?

“Hey, friend, do you want to hang out?”

“Hell no, I’d rather be anywhere else, unless you really, really need me. Then and only then might I deign to be there for you.”

So there you go. A friend in need is a friend indeed…unless that friend would rather be anywhere else.

Would you agree with me on this or do you think this “fortune” is right on?

In Other Words — The Present

Cat licking its chops“I brought you a present, momma, and it’s delicious,” Cat said after entering the house through the open glass door that separates our family room from the backyard patio and dropping a not quite dead rat at my wife’s feet.

My wife screamed and dropped the cup of coffee she was holding, the cup smashing into dozens of ceramic pieces and shards upon hitting the hardwood floor, causing Cat to scramble away.

Upon hearing my wife’s scream and the crash of the coffee cup, I came running from the kitchen and saw my wife standing on a chair pointing to a large, not quite dead rat on the family room floor.

That’s when I saw Cat in the corner, preening himself and looking completely unconcerned about of anything having to do with the brouhaha.

I gave the cat a what did you do? look, at which point, Cat looked back at me, licked his lips, and said, “Who, me?”

In Other WordsWritten for the In Other Words prompt from Patricia’s Place. The challenge this week is to write a story or poem of five lines or fewer using the picture above and/or the word “delicious.” Photo credit: Monika Schmidt from Pixabay.

FOWC with Fandango — Gourmand

FOWCWelcome to October 3, 2019 and to Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (aka, FOWC). It’s designed to fill the void after WordPress bailed on its daily one-word prompt.

I will be posting each day’s word just after midnight Pacific Time (US).

Today’s word is “gourmand.”

Write a post using that word. It can be prose, poetry, fiction, non-fiction. It can be any length. It can be just a picture or a drawing if you want. No holds barred, so to speak.

Once you are done, tag your post with #FOWC and create a pingback to this post if you are on WordPress. Or you can simply include a link to your post in the comments.

The issue with pingbacks not showing up seems to have been resolved, but you might check to confirm that your pingback is there. If not, please manually add your link in the comments.

And be sure to read the posts of other bloggers who respond to this prompt. You will marvel at their creativity.