This past Wednesday I posed a “provocative question” on my blog. I asked my fellow bloggers, “If you could be the opposite sex for one day, what would you do?” My post received a lot of really thoughtful, interesting, and fun responses. At first I wasn’t going to answer my own question, but then I decided “why not?” So here’s my “queen for a day” response.
I am all male. Of that there’s no question. All of my body parts — and body hair — will attest to that. I do have my feminine side, though. I can be sensitive, empathetic, moody. I’ve been known to shed a tear or two at tear jerker movies, although I hate when that happens because I hate being manipulated.
But were I to wake up one morning and find myself in a woman’s body, I would be thrilled. As long as I knew that the next day my regular equipment would be fully restored, that is.
The first thing I would do would be to stand in front of a full-length mirror and admire my feminine form. I would, no doubt, explore my female body. Yes, I would fondle my breasts, purely to see what it feels like to a woman to have her breasts fondled. And yes, I’d go down to where my penis would normally be and would experience the sensation of being touched there.
I’ve always wondered what an orgasm feels like for a woman and this could be my chance to find out for myself. I’ve asked my wife and other women to describe it, but there’s nothing like first hand experience.
But how to do that? I certainly wouldn’t seek out a male to get me off. Ew, I wouldn’t want one of those “things” inserted into me. So maybe I’d get my wife’s vibrator, which she insists she doesn’t have, but I don’t believe her. She’s always buying batteries.
Having scratched that itch, so to speak, I’d next want to get dressed and wander outside. I’d want to see if I’d be treated any differently as a woman than I am as a man. I kind of doubt it, though, because, unless my age, as well as my gender, changed, I’d be an older woman. I’m not implying that older women aren’t attractive. I’m just saying that they are less likely to be hit on than younger women.
I’d then ask my wife to join me for dinner to have a girls’ night out. After dinner, the two of us would to go to a classy bar. You know, where rich, sophisticated, debonair men hang out to relax and unwind after their stressful day of making important man-decisions. I’d be curious to see if any of them would buy me a drink or hit on me. And I’d also exhibit my masculine side if any of those bastards tried to hit on my wife, which would be much more likely, as she’s a much more attractive woman than I could ever be.
And then I’d go home, get into bed, and think about my day as a woman. And I’d look forward to waking up and being a male again.