Yes, I know it’s not Thursday, but this won’t be the first time I’ve been a day late and a dollar short.
Judy, over at Lifelessons, posted thirteen questions that she would like readers of her blog to answer. Well, it just so happens that I am a reader of Judy’s blog and I’m all about answering questions. So here we go….
1. What could you do with an artichoke rather than eating it?
I’m not a big fan of artichokes, so I don’t know. Maybe I’d try to find someone named Arty and force him to eat one whole and watch him choke on it? Get it? I’d watch Arty choke!
2. What is the strangest name you have ever heard and what is your association with it?
Cooper Penny. He was an HR manager at a company that was one of my clients and most of the people who worked there called him “Copper Penny” behind his back. He was actually a very nice guy. His favorite expression was “In for a penny, in for a pound.” He was the only one who thought that was funny. But he was British, and you know their sense of humor, right?
3. What is the most embarrassing thing your parents ever did?
After my sophomore year in college, when I was 19 and living at my parents’ home for the summer, I came home at around 11:00 am from a date I went on the night before to find a police car parked in our driveway and an officer sitting at the kitchen table with my parents. My mother was hysterically crying and when I walked into the house, my father yelled, “Where were you all night?” I answered, “I got lucky.” The police officer stood up and walked out of the house.
4. What was your most unusual pet?
A garter snake by the name of Pythius that I kept in a large aquarium. I used to feed him mice, which he’d swallow whole and I would entertain myself as I watched the mouse slowly work its way down the snake’s body as it was being digested.
5. What is your most favorite holiday and why?
Festivus, the holiday for the rest of us. Why? Because it’s a non-sectarian holiday. And now that I’m retired and no longer have a secretary, I consider myself to be non-sectarian.
6. What is your favorite footwear and why?
Brooks Addiction Walkers. Hey, they are practical and comfortable, albeit possibly the most boring shoe in the world.
7. What is your most irritating habit?
According to my wife, it’s when I ask her a question that I already asked her maybe five to ten minutes earlier. She says, “You already asked me that and I already answered it. You never listen to me.” I explain to her that I’m deaf in my left ear and don’t hear that well out of my right ear. But she’s probably right that I wasn’t paying attention when she answered my question the first time I asked it.
8. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
I don’t care as long as wherever I am has heat in the winter, air conditioning in the summer and a strong internet connection with good WiFi.
9. What is the most unusual place you have ever visited?
I love going to National Parks and I’ve been to quite a few. But of all of them, I think Bryce Canyon in Utah is one of the most unusual.You almost get the sense that you’re no longer on planet Earth when you’re there.
10. How did you meet your spouse or significant other?
My sister and brother-in-law were members of a tennis club and one of the people they played tennis with was visited one day by his 22 year-old daughter. My bother-in-law called me and gave me her phone number and urged me to call her. Which I did.
11. Who do you most admire?
Donald J. Trump.
Oh wait, the question was “admire most,” not “admire least.” In that case, it would be Barrack Obama. Take that, Trump!
12. If your pet could name you, what name would they give you and why?
My cat would call me Garçon because he’s always asking to be fed. My dog would call me Walker because as far as she’s concerned, that’s all I’m good for.
13. What is the most romantic thing that ever happened to you?
I’m not really what you’d call a romantic guy. I’m more of a pragmatist. But I suppose one might say that the most romantic thing that ever happened to me was when my wife said yes after I proposed to her. Well, she didn’t exactly say “yes.” She said, “It’s about fucking time you asked me.” It doesn’t get any more romantic than that, does it?
Okay, folks, there you have it. Care to take a shot at answering these? Go visit Judy’s blog and just do it.