One-Liner Wednesday — The Speed of Sound

“Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright…until you hear them speak.”

I’m not sure who said that. And I’m not sure who they said that about.

But I can make an educated guess.

Written for this week’s One-Liner Wednesday promp from Linda G. Hill.

Awaiting Moderation

your comment is awaiting moderation

Okay, bloggers. What are you afraid of? Are you worried about spam getting through to your blog’s comments section? Yeah, I can understand that.

But you know what? I don’t moderate comments on my blog and not a lot of spam makes it through that Akismet filter that comes standard with WordPress. Hardly any, in fact.

I don’t know what your experience is, but for me, that Akismet spam blocker thingie does a pretty damn good job.

So if you’re blogging on WordPress, why do you still insist on moderating your comments? Are you concerned that someone is going to take issue with what you wrote in your post and give you a hard time? Are you worried about trolls? Bad language? Inappropriate comments? What?

Hey, that’s the world of blogging. Some people will really enjoy what you wrote, while others might take strong exception to it and let you know. 

My previous blog was not on WordPress and it did not have any kind of integrated spam catcher application, so I would periodically receive what were clearly spam comments. I once received a comment that was full of links to porn sites, which I had to carefully check out in order to confirm just how inappropriate they were and that they deserved to be, um, moderated. That was exhausting.

So I changed my settings to require comment moderation and that pretty much took care of the problem. Except that I had to manually “approve” each and every comment.

When I started blogging again this past May, I chose WordPress and I set up my site to moderate comments.

What a freakin’ pain in the ass. I was receiving a bunch of emails from WordPress telling me that I had all these comments that I had to approve. It turned out that every one was legit.

When I realized that this Akismet thing works really well at catching spam, I changed my settings back to no moderation. And it’s been painless for me.

No comment moderation

Maybe I wasn’t always thrilled with what some commenters wrote, but as I said, that’s blogging. I’m sure I’ve written comments on other bloggers’ posts that were not exactly all lovey-dovey.

But I have to tell you, fellow bloggers, when I comment on your blog and I see “Your comment is awaiting moderation,” it pisses me off, especially if I’ve commented previously on your blog and you ultimately approved that comment. Hey, it’s me. I’m back. Why are you still moderating me? Are you some kind of sadist?

I’m an instant gratification kind of a guy and I don’t like having to wait until you eventually find the time to read and approve my comments. I want to see my articulate, intelligent, witty, and worthwhile comments show up on your post immediately.

Listen, life is a bit of a crap shoot anyway. Learn to live a little. Take a slight risk (a very, very slight risk) and stop all that comment moderation crap. Just go with the flow.

And if you disagree with me, I might just have to delete your comment and block you!

Dirty Words


Here’s some scientifically sound advice. If you hit your thumb with a hammer, go ahead and let loose with that string of expletives. It actually will make you feel better.

In a study published a few years back in Scientific American, Richard Stephens, a psychology professor at Keele University in the U.K., said, “I would advise people, if they hurt themselves, to swear.” Professor Stephens became interested in the function of profanity after hearing an earful of it from his wife while she was in labor. He wondered if it served some practical purpose.

In one experiment he conducted, participants were asked to immerse their hands in a tub of ice cold water. Those who were encouraged to curse freely were able to keep their hands in the water 40% longer than those asked to be silent or to avoid using swear words. Afterwards, the foul-mouthed subjects also reported feeling less pain than their mealy-mouthed counterparts.

Cursing seems to elevate the heart rate and may, by increasing aggression levels, trigger the flight-or-fight response. Previous research shows that this response temporarily mutes the sensation of pain, so that we can respond quickly to a threat.

The most popular swear words for people in pain, Stephens found, are fuck, shit, bitch (as in “son of a…”), and bastard. For me, were I to hit my thumb with a hammer, I would be most likely to scream, “Jesus Fucking Christ!”

Written for today’s one-word prompt, “elevate.”