Weekend Writing Prompt — You’re Fired

6F5139F4-804C-4E84-9E4C-1CD0C84F39DBGrimace, in order to be my new Secretary of Labor, you have to be willing to promote alternative facts and support my lunacy. I don’t think you’ve got what it takes.

You’re Fired!

(Exactly 33 words)


F99A06CE-4B67-493E-B110-E95F299D66AEWritten for Sammi Cox’s Weekend Writing Prompt, where we are challenged to write a poem or piece of prose using the word “grimace” in exactly 33 words.

On-the-Job Jealousy

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Walt walked into the office after lunch and immediately noticed the two floral arrangements sitting on his coworker’s desk.

“Who sent you flowers?” Walt asked Anna.

“Aren’t they beautiful,” Anna replied, blushing.

“Yeah, lovely,” Walt said sarcastically. “Who sent them to you?”

“My date from last night.”

Walt and Anna had been dating for a few months until Anna had to break it off due to Walt’s possessiveness and unbridled jealousy.

“Yeah? Did you have to give him a blow job to get those?” Walt asked Anna.

“Asshole!” Anna snapped.

“Whore!” Walt snapped back.

“You’re both fired!” snapped their boss.

(100 words)


Written for this week’s Friday Fictioneers challenge from Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.

 

May Your Life Be Filled With Likes

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An irritating tap, tap, tap on his shoulder awakened Stanley from his dormant state. Without opening his eyes or looking up, he practically screamed, “WHAT?!”

“Stanley, you’re asleep at your desk.” Stanley sat up abruptly upon hearing his boss’s voice. “Are you not getting enough sleep?” his boss inquired. “Are you ill?”

“No, no. I’m fine.”

“Then why are you sleeping at your desk?”

Stanley let out a deep sigh. “I have a wife and kids who are always demanding my attention. I have a dog and a cat that need to be tended to.” Stanley looked up at his boss and continued. “I have books to read, TV shows to watch, meals to eat, personal hygiene to take care of, and sleep to get.”

“Yes, Stanley, we all have those demands on our lives, but you also have this job,” the boss said. “And we need you to be awake and alert when you are here at the office. We need you to do your job.”

“But I also have my blog,” Stanley said, plaintively. “I have posts to write, comments to respond to, and other bloggers’ posts to read and comment on.”

Stanley’s boss couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“So I stay up late most nights,” Stanley explained. “Sometimes the whole night,” he continued, “to keep up with my blog.”

“I can understand that, Stanley, and I appreciate your honesty,” his boss said. “So I’ll tell you what. I’m going to make it easy on you. You’re fired. This way you can spend all the time you need to pursue your blog, which is clearly your priority.”

“What? Wait! No!” Stanley wailed in protest.

“I’ll have Helen from HR call you, Stanley’s boss said. “May you life be filled with likes, Stanley.”


This post was written for today’s one-word daily prompt, “Dormant.”