Oh My

7745281F-1901-4DC6-8F99-C01271B73B9D.jpeg“Pretty soon I’ll be free of this crap,” Edward said to the guy standing in line next to him.

“Oh yeah,” the guy said. “How so?”

“I’m retiring soon,” Edward said, “and then this rat race will be over and I won’t be rushing to the airport and standing in long check-in lines and having to deal with this bullshit anymore.”

“Lucky you,” the guy said. “I can only dream about being able to ditch this hassle. So where are you headed?

“I’m on my way to Los Angeles,” Edward said.

“No kidding?” the guy said. “Me too.”

“Really? What’s taking you there?” Edward asked.

“Well,” the guy said, “I run a company that puts on beauty contests around the country and I have to screen a bunch of prospective contestants before Saturday’s pageant.”

“You mean like the Miss America pageant?”

“Kind of,” the guy said with a smile on his face. “It’s the Miss Porn America pageant. It’s little more kinky than Miss America. And why are you going there?”

“I’m surprising my granddaughter,” Edward said. “She’s a budding actress and is auditioning for some show there.”

Edward thought for a second. “Oh my,” he said.

(200 words)


I spent much of today with family and friends, but I wanted to get my Sunday Photo Fiction post in before I called it a day. I also squeezed in these one-word prompts: Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (free), Ragtag Daily Prompt (dream), Scotts Daily Prompt (screen), Your Daily Word Prompt (pageant).

Sunday Photo Fiction — Proof Positive

B8ECDB36-7ED4-4A4B-94A3-F174B91B5551

It was the family’s last day in London. They headed out of their hotel to grab some breakfast before heading to Heathrow for their flight back to the States.

After finishing breakfast, the young daughter caught something out of the corner of her eye and she ran over to take a closer look. After confirming what she saw, she ran back to her parents and, in an excited voice, said, “Daddy, I need you to buy me something.”

“Sweetie,” her father said, “We already have enough souvenirs. We don’t need to buy any more tchotchkes.”

“I don’t know what tchotchkes are, Daddy,” the girl said, “but this isn’t a souvenir. Come see.” She grabbed her father’s hand and pulled him over to see what she wanted so badly. When the two of them, plus the little girl’s mother, saw what she had pointed out, her father and mother both started to laugh. The father bought the item and handed it to his daughter.

“I understand why you wanted this so much,” the father said to his daughter. “But your Mom and I didn’t need to see the headline in the newspaper to know that you exist, Nessie.”

(197 words)


Written for today’s Sunday Photo Fiction prompt from Susan Spaulding. Photo credit: C.E. Ayr.

Sunday Photo Fiction — The Room

EFBFC63F-753E-4176-9D73-7C286C5DEEBFThe lamp on the bedside table was always on. The bed was always made except when Donna was sleeping in it. Her room was tidy. She tried to keep it looking like it could have belonged to any normal girl her age.

But Donna wasn’t the living the life of a normal girl, nor was her room even close to a normal room. She had a few books to read, a landline telephone that wasn’t connected, and a cellphone with no SIM card or WiFi access. No TV, radio, or clock. Donna was never sure what time it was. The black curtains, where a window should have been, concealed nothing but a blank wall. A small, windowless bathroom was attached to the room. The only door to the room was locked from the outside.

Donna couldn’t remember how long she’d been locked in the room. Weeks? Months? She didn’t know. Twice a day he’d bring in food. Once a week he’d have his way with her. Every other week he’d bring in fresh towels, clean bed linens, and laundered clothing.

This was her world now, at least until she could figure out a way to end it.

(198 words)


Written for Susan Spaulding’s Sunday Photo Fiction prompt.

Sunday Photo Fiction — Favorite Cartoon Characters

1786A868-8383-4A1E-ADD6-3FC5C406C94AThe old lady had a reputation for always offering a helping hand. Unfortunately, she was a lot less mobile these days than she used to be and, therefore, had to prioritize how she spent her charitable time. But rather than allowing her disability to be a source of angst, she decided that, instead of going out into the community, she would invite people into her home.

She had always been an artsy type, and was able to put her skills to use by selling her crafts, for which she would charge just enough to cover her costs.

For Halloween, the old lady would always decorate her home with ghosts, skeletons, and cobwebs. She would invite local children to go out to the meadow and select pumpkins to bring back to her place. She would ask them each who their favorite cartoon character was and, much to their delight, would create a pumpkin in the image of that character.

Sadly, this was the old lady’s final Halloween, as her age finally caught up with her. But in her honor, the town renamed the community center after her and folks continued her tradition of making cartoon character pumpkins for the children.

(199 words)


Written for Susan Spaulding Sunday Photo Fiction prompt. Photo credit: Rick Spaulding.

Also written for these one-word prompts: Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (prioritize), Word of the Day Challenge (angst), Ragtag Daily Prompt (home), Scotts Daily Prompt (charge), Your Daily Word Prompt (cobweb), and Daily Addictions (meadow).

Sunday Photo Fiction — One Man’s Junk

F4463EFA-0E1A-43E9-82C0-17A0642EC950When the fierce windstorm blew down a large limb from the old tree tree in his backyard, it fell on the two old rocking chairs that Archie kept on his patio, which he reluctantly decided to trash.

Archie took the two chairs and put them on his front lawn. He dragged the felled tree branch and placed it across the two chairs and then called a local trash company to haul it away.

About an hour later there was a knock at the door. Archie headed to the front door and flung it open. “Yeah?” he said.

“Is that yours?” a man said, pointing to the chairs and tree branch draped over them.

“Yeah,” Archie said. “I’ve arranged to have ‘em hauled off tomorrow, so don’t worry about it. It will be gone soon.”

“That’s not why I’m here,” the man responded. “I’m the associate curator for the Museum of Modern Art. I was walking by, took a picture, and sent it to my boss. He wants to display it as is in an exhibit at the museum.”

“Seriously?” Archie said. “Well, I guess what they is true.”

“What’s that?” the man asked.

“One man’s junk is another man’s treasure.”


Written for Sue Spaulding’s Sunday Photo Fiction prompt. Photo credit: yours truly. Taken at the de Young Museum in Golden Gate Park. Also for my FOWC prompt from yesterday, “fierce.”