FFfAW — So Much For Global Warming


“It freaking snowed last night,” Jonathan said as he looked out of the kitchen window.

“Get out!” Jeanine, exclaimed. “It never snows around here.” She came over to the window. “Will you look at that? That’s got to be a couple of inches, right?”

“See, Jeanine,” Jonathan said, “the President is right. This whole global warming thing. It’s just a big hoax. How can the the planet be getting hotter if it got cold enough to snow in LA last night?”

Jeanine looked at her husband. “I think you’re confusing weather and climate. Climate change is not just about warming temperatures. It alters weather patterns, which can result in extreme weather events. Heat waves and large storms will become more frequent and more intense. There will be more precipitation, storms, floods, and droughts due to climate change.”

“Woman,” Jonathan said. “You’ve been drinking too much of that liberal Kool Aid lately.”

“Well, Jonathan, maybe you should ask Trump why it snowed here last night. He undoubtably knows more than the climatologists.”

(171 words)

Written for Priceless Joy’s Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers. Photo credit: Yinglan.

Mellow Yellow

Yellow sky

The photo above is un-retouched. It hasn’t been run through any filter or photo editing app. This is what the sky over San Francisco looked like early yesterday morning. It had a brownish-yellow tint to it, which lasted until late morning. It was really quite eerie.

The cause of this unusual sky was wildfires in Lake, Napa, and Yolo counties located to the northeast of San Francisco. Strong southeasterly winds sent smoke and ash drifting across the Bay Area, the result of which was the sky taking on that sickish tint.

By Saturday night, the Yolo County fire had turned into a 32,500-acre blaze in the face of what is called “red-flag” weather conditions — high temperatures, gusty winds and low humidity — on land dried by years of drought. As of last night, it was only 2% contained and firefighters ordered evacuations.

The wildfire season in Northern California typically starts in the fall, after hot, dry summer months leave brush and woods primed to burn. But this year, as in recent years, the fires have come early. And they aren’t likely to end any time soon.

But don’t worry, this climate change thing is a Chinese hoax. And yellow skies filled with smoke and ash are pretty, aren’t they?

Word of the Day — No Lie

E6208F48-6E96-4972-9387-F85850300E1ADonald Trump, the President of the United States, has called global warming a Chinese hoax. He also said,

“Obama’s talking about all of this with the global warming and…a lot of it’s a hoax. It’s a hoax. I mean, it’s a money-making industry, OK? It’s a hoax, a lot of it.”

So Donald Trump claims that climate change/global warming is nothing but a hoax perpetrated by the Chinese (and one of Trump’s best buddies, Chinese leader Xi Jinping) in order to hurt American competitiveness.

And you know it’s true because Donald Trump said it. And he never lies.

Written for today’s Word of the Day prompt, “hoax.”

Another Outrageous Scam

93142ACA-9AAC-4651-A464-8DE31F54EAE6The coupon pictured above says, “Valid for one beverage per customer per visit only at participating locations. Limited to persons of African American heritage and/or identity at time of exchange.”

It’s a hoax

In the wake of the controversy at a Philadelphia Starbucks where the police were summoned to remove two black men who were waiting to meet a friend and didn’t purchase anything, a despicable scam has surfaced.

According to the Associated Press, social media accounts that have been identified as coming from white nationalist groups are promoting bogus coupons offering free drinks to people of color.

This scam is likely an attempt to stir more bad sentiments about the coffee chain, which apparently is not exactly a favorite of white nationalists.

This is fucking outrageous.

#writephoto — The Flood

“It will never be the same,” lamented Jerry. “Even once the flood waters recede this time, this probably won’t be the last time.”

“Yeah, I know,” Gary concurred. “This is the third time since 2010 that this valley has flooded, but this time it’s by far the worst.”

Jerry looked across the water that covered the completely submerged roadway that ran under the bridge separating the north and south sides of the park. “It’s still too deep for us to wade in there and try to clear the debris out of the storm drain,” Jerry said. “The water has to be seven or eight feet deep.”

“We might have to get some scuba divers from the naval base to go down there and see what they can do,” Gary said. “Otherwise, there’s no telling how long it will be before we can open this road again.”

Jerry lit up a cigarette and took a deep drag. He offered one to Gary, but Gary didn’t smoke. “I think Mother Nature is sending us a message,” Jerry said after a moment of silence.

“I agree,” Gary said, “but it seems like no one is hearing her. No one is paying attention.”

Jerry’s phone buzzed. “I just got a text from dispatch,” he said. “They need us over at the dam. They say the water is still rising and they’re afraid the dam is going to fail under the strain.”

“It’s a good thing this whole climate change thing is a hoax,” Gary sarcastically said.

The two men rowed their boat toward the dam, having no idea what they could possibly do to stop the dam from flooding the entire valley.

Written for this week’s Thursday Photo Prompt from Sue Vincent.