Bought the Farm

310b6e79-a568-4b68-87e5-2285a810b3b4.jpeg“Momma, why are we here in church today?” Ruth asked. “It’s not Sunday.”

“I know, sweetie,” Donna said, pulling a tissue out of her purse. “Honey, can you please take that bubblegum out of your mouth and put it in this tissue? You shouldn’t chew gum in church.”

“But why are we here in the middle of the week?” Ruth asked again.

“Because your Uncle Benny bought the farm, sweetie,” Donna said.

“Uncle Benny bought a farm,” Ruth squealed. “Can we go?”

“Shh,” Donna said, “we’re in church. ‘Bought the farm’ is an expression, sweetie. It means Uncle Benny died.”

Disappointed, Ruth looked at her mother. “Why didn’t you just say that he died?”

“I shouldn’t have used that idiom, Ruth,” her mother said. “I think it was originally an English expression that means died, but it was irreverent of me to use it in church.”

“So how did Uncle Benny die?” Ruth asked.

“Well, Aunt Mabel said he lost his footing while he was off doing some mountain climbing,” Donna said. “But Uncle Benny was a lush and a liar and it wouldn’t surprise me if he fell off of a bar stool at the local pub.”

Ruth started to giggle uncontrollably until she saw the dirty look the pastor was giving her.

“Let us kneel and pay to God Almighty,” the pastor said in a booming voice, “and ask to be forgiven for our sins and trespasses as we remember with fondness our dearly departed friend, Ben Flannigan, who was the victim of a freak accident.”

Donna grabbed Ruth’s hand as each tried hard to not crack up laughing.


Written for today’s Three Things Challenge from Paula Light, where the three things are “liar,” “bubblegum,” and “mountain.” Also for these daily prompts: Ragtag Daily Prompt (farm), Your Daily Word Prompt (original), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (kneel), and Word of the Day Challenge (almighty).

#writephoto — Heritage

2142471b-500f-4489-bbb7-15e0f3631cb6Phoebe was excited when the envelope arrived. Having been adopted when she was just a baby, she knew nothing about her heritage. She dearly loved the couple who adopted her, and they were the only parents she ever knew, but once she turned 25, the void in her life, that of finding her roots, had to be addressed. It was an itch that she knew had to be scratched.

It took nearly four months, but the envelope from the DNA testing service Phoebe had engaged finally was delivered. Her hands were actually trembling as she carefully opened the envelope and read the report.

456459cc-6aaf-443e-b38c-11d398393fffWhen she saw that her heritage was 90% Scottish, it both shocked and excited Phoebe. She decided that she needed to dig deeper and to investigate her family tree. Did she come from peasant stock, the working class, or maybe even the aristocracy? Phoebe had to know; she became obsessed with learning more of her heritage. She paid more money to the DNA testing service and ultimately learned that her ancestry could be traced all the way back to the time of the Scottish king, Robert I, popularly known as Robert the Bruce.

That’s when Phoebe took a leave of absence from her job and flew to Scotland to find out even more. She spent two months going deeper and deeper into her family’s history. It ultimately led her to a cemetery where she came across an old stone sarcophagus carved in the shape of a warrior knight. This knight, who had fought bravely in battle along side Robert the Bruce, was distantly related to her historic clan.

Phoebe was so overcome with emotions when she discovered the location of her most distant relative that she came back the next day and placed a single red rose across the sarcophagus, along with a handwritten note that read, “In memory of a loyal knight of the House of Bruce who gave his life for his king in July 1314.”

Shortly thereafter, Phoebe flew home and told her adoptive parents of her discovery, and then hugged them both, thanking them profusely for their love and care.


Written for Sue Vincent’s Thursday Photo Prompt.

#MicroMondays — Immunity

E86CE1F4-00DF-44D2-AB16-31E443C79C16“All stayed well for less than twenty-four hours,” recounted Paul, one of the few survivors. “Then the first symptoms started to appear and people were getting sick. By the end of the second day, half the population had been wiped out and the rest were in bad shape. A handful of us seemed to be immune and we managed to survive.”


Written for today’s #MicroMondays prompt. It is taken from the short story “The Bodyguard,” by Lee Child. The challenge is to write a 54 word story, not including the eight-word prompt. The prompt, “All stayed well for less than twenty-four hours,” must be used verbatim.