Maggie, at From Cave Walls, and Lauren, at LSS Attitude of Gratitude, alternate hosting Throwback Thursday. The idea of the prompt is for them to give us a topic and for us to write a post in which we share our own memories or experiences about the given topic. This week, Maggie gives us the topic of rules and family hierarchy, and child/parent relationships. She asks the question, “are rules made to be broken?”
Here are Lauren’s questions.
1) Who in your family was the person who made and enforced rules?
I wouldn’t say that my parents were sticklers when it came to rules, but between my mother and father, my mother was more influential when it came to setting and enforcing the rules.
2) Did you grow up with many rules, or was your life a little more flexible?
As I said above, my folks weren’t sticklers who imposed a whole lot of rules, so I would go with a little more flexible.
3) Were you a rule follower or a rule breaker?
I followed the rules I liked and broke the ones I didn’t.
4) How were discipline and – in contrast – rewards managed in your household?
My folks were not disciplinarians. I don’t recall ever getting punished or grounded, but I also don’t recall having any “good behavior” rewards bestowed upon me.
5) Were you given the opportunity to plead your case in matters of disagreement?
Most of the time, yes. And I had two older sisters who often assisted me in that endeavor.
6) What tools did your parents use – ‘I’m going to count to three‘ or ‘don’t make me get up’ or a time-out chair?
It was mostly “go to your room,” which was fine with me, as being sent to my room was like Br’er Fox throwing Br’er Rabbit into the briar patch.
7) Did fear of discipline curb your desire to break or bend the rules?
The recurring theme in my responses to these questions is that there just wasn’t much in the way of discipline meted out to me, so fear of discipline wasn’t a big deterrent.
8) Did your upbringing influence the way you (as an adult) managed rules in your own home?
I was definitely more strict with my kids than my parents were with me. That said, my wife was more of the disciplinarian than I was.
9) Were you ever ‘grounded’? Do you want to share the story?
Nope. Never grounded.
10) Did you break rules your parents never knew about? Want to confess and leave with a clear conscious? No?
I’d tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.