Day: May 12, 2022

Fibbing Friday — Superstitions Edition

Fandango7 Comments

Frank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as hosts for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in our responses. This week is Di’s turn and, because today is Friday the 13th, she wants to know…

1. How many years bad luck do you get if you break a mirror? Depends upon the size of the mirror. The larger the mirror, the more years of bad luck you get.
2. What shouldn’t you walk under? A large bird with diarrhea.
3. Why are black cats crossing your path considered unlucky? Because at night you might accidentally step on them if you don’t see them in the dark and then they’ll get pissed and scratch the shit out of you.
4. Why do we ‘knock on wood’? Because knocking on steel can damage your knuckles.
5. Why are horseshoes considered lucky? They are lucky for horses because the keep them from stubbing their hooves.
6. Why do we cross our fingers for good luck? People often cross their fingers behind their backs when telling a lie in the hope that they won’t get caught in their lie. It rarely works.
7. Why is 13 considered an unlucky number? Because that is how old most teenagers are when they start getting acne.
8. On the other hand, why is 7 considered lucky? Because 7 ate 9 and that’s extremely funny to all seven year olds.
9. What is signified by itchy hands? Excessive masturbation.
10. Why should you not put shoes on the table? Because even though tables have legs, they generally don’t have feet and because they are inanimate objects that can’t walk, it would really look ridiculous to put shoes on their legs.

Throwback Thursday — Doctors and Dentists

Fandango3 Comments

Maggie, at From Cave Walls, and Lauren, at LSS Attitude of Gratitude, alternate hosting Throwback Thursday. The idea of the prompt is for them to give us a topic and for us to write a post in which we share our own memories or experiences about the given topic. This week, Lauren chose the topic of “Remembering Visits to Doctors and/or Dentists.”

This week Lauren would like us to think back to our early medical and/or dental visits.

1. Were doctor/dentist appointments a regular part of your childhood?

As far as I can remember, yes.

2. Did you go for well-checks or just when you were ill or in pain?

Once my permanent teeth came in, my parents took me to the dentist every six months. When I got braces on my teeth, I went to the orthodontist once a month for about two years. I hated that. As far as my pediatrician, I don’t remember routine doctor visits, so I guess it was mostly for illness or injury.

3. Were you frightened by the medical professionals? If so, were there specific reasons?

Not really, but I didn’t like to go to the orthodontist for my monthly adjustments. That caused my mouth to ache for a day or two after each visit.

4. Were your parents afraid of medical professionals?

Not that I recall.

5. Was waiting in the exam room stressful to you?

Not so much stressful as boring.

6. Did your early visits result in your being afraid of needles?

I obviously wasn’t a fan of needles/shots, but I don’t remember being afraid of them. I am certainly not afraid of them today for things like the flu shots or COVID vaccines.

7. Does the sight of your own blood bother you?

Actually, I’m more bothered by sight of other people‘s blood than I am of my own.

8. Did you ever have the need to go to an emergency room?

More times than I care to remember.

9. Did your early experiences impact your current attitudes about medical care?

I suppose so. I still go to the dentist every six months (now that the pandemic has lessened a bit). I also have an annual physical exam from my primary care physician. But when it comes to other health care providers, I only go when it’s absolutely necessary.

Thursday Inspiration — Eye Doctor

Fandango17 Comments

I went to see my eye doctor because I was having trouble seeing things clearly. I said to him, “Doctor, my eyes, tell me what is wrong. Was I unwise to leave them open for so long?”

He examined my eyes, asked me to read the eye chart. Then he said, “Your eyes seem fine to me.”

“Doctor you must help me if you can,” I said. “My eyes cannot see the sky or the evil and the good. I feel as though I’m wandering aimlessly through this world where people go just where they will.”

“Interesting,” my eye doctor said. “Tell me more.”

“I’ve been waiting to awaken from these horrible dreams,” I said, “and yet even though I can hear the cries of those people in my dreams, I’ve learned how not to cry. Please doctor, tell me what to do.”

The doctor took out a pad of paper, wrote something down, and handed it to me. I looked at it and asked, “What’s this?”

“It’s the name of a psychiatrist,” he said. “There’s nothing wrong with your eyes, but you’ve got a serious case of mind-fuck.”

Written for Jim Adams’ Thursday Inspiration prompt.

Simply 6 Minutes — The Inheritance

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Edgar was thrilled when, at the reading of his Uncle Frank’s last will and testament, his late uncle had bequeathed to him his classic motorcycle that Edgar had both admired and coveted.

After the reading of the will, Edgar approached the lawyer and asked where and when he could get the keys and retrieve the motorcycle. The lawyer told Edgar that the motorcycle’s keys had long ago been lost, but the cycle itself was in his late uncle’s backyard out behind the shed.

Undeterred by the fact that there were no keys to the motorcycle — Edgar figured he could engage the services of a locksmith — he went to his late uncle’s property, went behind the shed, and found his inheritance.

When he saw the motorcycle, he realized that, in addition to a locksmith, he’d require the service of an arborist.

Written for Christine Bialczak’s Simply 6 Minutes prompt. Photo Credit: magdolenelives.tumblr.com.

FOWC with Fandango — Proper

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FOWC

It’s May 12, 2022. Welcome to Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (aka, FOWC). I will be posting each day’s word just after midnight Pacific Time (U.S.).

Today’s word is “proper.”

Write a post using that word. It can be prose, poetry, fiction, non-fiction. It can be any length. It can be just a picture or a drawing if you want. No holds barred, so to speak.

Once you are done, tag your post with #FOWC and create a pingback to this post if you are on WordPress. Please check to confirm that your pingback is there. If not, please manually add your link in the comments.

And be sure to read the posts of other bloggers who respond to this prompt. Show them some love.