Fandango’s Provocative Question #138


Welcome once again to Fandango’s Provocative Question. Each week I will pose what I think is a provocative question for your consideration.

By provocative, I don’t mean a question that will cause annoyance or anger. Nor do I mean a question intended to arouse sexual desire or interest.

I overheard two people having a disagreement this week. One person told the other that she was too willing to settle for something when she shouldn’t. The other person responded that she wasn’t settling, she was just accepting the reality of the situation. So that got me thinking about the difference between “settling” and “accepting.” Hence, my provocative question for this week…

Do you see a difference between settling for things and accepting the way things are? If so, in what way are they different? If not why do you feel settling and accepting are the same?

If you choose to participate, write a post with your response to the question. Once you are done, tag your post with #FPQ and create a pingback to this post if you are on WordPress. Or you can simply include a link to your post in the comments. But remember to check to confirm that your pingback or your link shows up in the comments.

22 thoughts on “Fandango’s Provocative Question #138

  1. rugby843 October 6, 2021 / 8:44 am

    After moving here and realizing I no longer had easy good weather access to my doc, the hospital-across the street-the grocery store or friends, I had to accept it.  It was not easy, still isn’t.  I rarely just settle for anything if I feel it needs to be changed. However, there are many things the last five years I do not settle for but can do little about. They are two different things in my book.  Great question!

    Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPad

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Nope, Not Pam October 6, 2021 / 12:13 pm

    Settling implies you aren’t satisfied, accepting implies you are.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango October 6, 2021 / 10:19 pm

      That’s an interesting perspective.


  3. cagedunn October 6, 2021 / 12:49 pm

    I accept the limitations of life, the structural forms that define society, but when it comes to achieving my dreams, there is no settling for less than what I’m capable of at the time, while always striving to learn from what’s been done so next time is better.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Carol anne October 6, 2021 / 5:46 pm

    Accepting is when you cant change things, settling is when your resigned to things being the way they are. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. CARAMEL October 7, 2021 / 2:29 am

    Interesting question, and I think it would depend on the situation, the issue, the timing.

    In most areas, I would accept or settle even if I don’t agree. I think that often there are areas which need some compromise or accepting that there is more than one way to do things. In most areas I would be very willing to yield. Plus, I respect the legal freedoms and rights of others. Do I agree with smoking tobacco? No way. In the health service, smoking is generally viewed as one of the most harmful factors to health and costs the NHS more money than any other factor. But we have to accept people’s legal freedoms to harm themselves. Which is slightly odd, because in other incidents of more acute self-harm, people might be referred to mental health services. It is sometimes hard to reconcile the way people abuse their body for recreational purposes and then turn up in A&E or in in need or expensive treatments when they have organ failure or chronic breathing difficulties. But we have to accept this is part of package – completely bonkers, but a daily part of our work.

    The entire economic system is so riddled with corruption and abuse it is hard to be aware of some of the situations that go on around the world and are overlooked by authorities or fall down the list of their priorities. But knowing that they are allowed to be there for the present time means having to get on with it. It is sometimes very uncomfortable when you become aware of the level of corruption. But accepting they will be held accountable at some point helps to continue operating within the current system. Would I like to see those abusing their authority removed? Of course. But for the moment, we have to live with a chronically corrupt system.

    But in some areas, even if the law allows people to do what they wanted to, I would be firm in my own choices. At school I developed a pretty steely character, and even when threatened or physically assaulted, I would not give in to what other children wanted to get me to do. When I saw those same “bullies” trying to intimidate any other children, I would stand up to them and make it very clear that I was not afraid of them. I ended up with a crew of littler kids who doted on me. When I was seventeen and in my first job, I stood up to my manager when she asked me to take part in something that was clearly deceitful. I articulated my view as respectfully as I could but made it very firm I would not be involved. Within six months, my manager and three other members of staff had been suspended and then sacked due to dishonesty and gross negligence. Those experiences made me realize that even when I am frightened, standing firm for what is clearly right effects your conscience, your self-respect, your energy levels, your peace of mind and the quality of your sleep – your all round well-being.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Irene October 7, 2021 / 6:59 am

    Quoting the Serenity Prayer by American theologian, Reinhold Niebuhr: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Marilyn Armstrong October 7, 2021 / 4:26 pm

    Since I completely missed yesterday because (gasp) we were out and about doing “stuff” including getting flu shots, checking out the (count’em) THREE new pot shops within a mile of our house. That is far too many shops for the local population, but Owen says it’s because we are so close to the Rhode Island border where they don’t have any legal pot shops. We actually have more pot shops than liquor stores. I’m sure they won’t all survive.

    Otherwise, we were picking up a few groceries. Buying fresh birdseed, and getting flu shots.

    In theory, there’s a difference between the two words but honestly, I don’t see any meaningful difference between the two words in this context. It’s a technicality. Maybe the real difference is less in the words used than what the speaker means. Otherwise, I’d call it editorial nit-picking.

    Whether you call it settling or accepting, it’s the same thing for the same reasons. Or anyway, that’s what I think, for what it’s worth.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango October 7, 2021 / 10:02 pm

      You’re right. The differences are subtle and dependent upon the context. Three pot shops in your little town. That’s three more than are in my town of 40,000!


  8. Marleen October 7, 2021 / 6:57 pm

    I wonder how many women will accept getting biopsies because of enlarged lymph nodes after vaccination (especially with more than one shot and with boostering).


    “What we noticed is that lymph nodes actually were enlarged for a longer period of time,” said Dr. Lisa Mullen, a radiologist at Johns Hopkins Medicine.

    Mullen explained that enlarged lymph nodes after getting the vaccine is a normal and often expected immune response, but now, in some cases, doctors doing mammograms and ultrasounds are seeing the larger lymph nodes persist for months longer than initially predicted.

    “The original follow-up recommendation was follow up in four to 12 weeks, with the expectation that the lymph node would have all come down to normal size during that time period. What we actually found is that for some patients they persisted in being enlarged beyond the three-month mark,” she said. And that is leading to more follow-ups and in some cases biopsies.

    Mullen emphasizes that should not stop people from getting vaccinated or getting their regular mammogram screenings, but it’s important to be aware, especially as more people are getting their boosters.

    “We may be calling them back in to look at those and that may initiate that follow up pathway, but even though that seems alarming, it really is not related to breast cancer and we just want to be as cautious as we can be,” Mullen said.

    Mullen said they’re still learning about who is most affected by enlarged lymph nodes that persist after vaccination and for how long. She expects more studies in the months ahead.


    Liked by 1 person

  9. Myrna Migala October 8, 2021 / 12:41 pm

    My husband R.I.P. his moto was if we can do something about the situation then do it! If we can do nothing about it, don’t worry about it!

    Liked by 1 person

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