Fibbing Friday — Marital Bliss?

Frank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as hosts for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in our responses. Today is Di’s turn to host and here are her questions.

1. What is the significance of ‘jumping the broomstick’?

It’s what the bride does at a witch wedding just after taking the vows.

2. What is a bottom drawer/Hope chest?

It’s where the newly married husband hides all of his porn.

3. Why is it considered unlucky to wear green at a wedding?

Because it will clash with the green with envy expressions on the faces of the other bride wannabes in attendance.

4. Why is the chief bridesmaid referred to as a Matron of Honor?

Because she’s usually older and matronly.

5. What is the duty of the Best Man?

To try to talk the groom out of getting married.

6. What is a Groom’s Cake?

It’s a cake baked in the shape of the groom’s favorite sport.

7. How many tiers does a traditional wedding cake have?

One tier if it’s the bride’s first marriage and one additional tier for each previous marriage.

8. Why are black cats considered a lucky token at weddings?

It means that the marriage will have nine lives.

9. Why does the bride traditionally wear a veil over her face going up the aisle?

To hide the hives that have broken out all over her face due to being so nervous.

10. Why do they call the ‘holiday’ after a wedding a honeymoon?

Because the tradition is for the bride and groom to smear their butts with honey and then to moon their wedding guests as the limousine pulls away from the reception.

10 thoughts on “Fibbing Friday — Marital Bliss?

  1. Renard Moreau July 2, 2021 / 5:38 pm

    🙂 Fandango, does your wife ever read your blog posts?

    Well, if she did, she would probably break down into laughter when she reads about the bride and the groom smearing their butts in honey and mooning the wedding guests.

    I hereby crown you the king of “Fibbing Friday”!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango July 2, 2021 / 7:29 pm

      She does occasionally, but she’s not impressed. And as to being crowned the king of Fibbing Friday, that ya rather dubious distinction, but I thank you nonetheless, Renard.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Marleen July 2, 2021 / 8:42 pm

    I enjoyed these answers, especially 7 through 9.

    And the second one is too real.

    I didn’t know it was considered unlucky to wear green to a wedding. I’d somehow, though, internalized that someone other than the bride should not wear any version of white. However, I’ve mentioned this, before, and gotten perplexed responses.

    I read, somewhere, that anything in the peacock theme is unlucky to be associated with a wedding. Peculiar story: when I went with my now daughter-in-law and her mother and grandmother to pick out her wedding dress, we observed another bride-to-be being fawned over by the retail personnel but being brought a veil or something (which must have really been a scarf or something else) with a peacock motif. Really, I alone observed this (I think most people in our culture aren’t aware of the idea). This was a terrible misstep at a high end store — and one of the girls working there quickly hid the item away. Luckily for the sales staff, the bride was so caught up in how imperfect she felt her body or the way she fit things was that she didn’t notice their embarrassment. But this was all sad, poor girl. She wasn’t skinny, but she was beautiful (and I really only mean she wasn’t skinny not that she was overweight). On the other hand, I think the boutique was not lucky, after all. They seem to have had a way of making the clientele unhappy. My son’s then fiancé was crying, too, by the time we abruptly left that place (they weren’t pleased with her budget). Well, we found her a unique gown ideal for her at the next place (which place also had better accommodations with the kind of dressing rooms — not stalls — that I expect.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. leigha66 July 14, 2021 / 1:30 pm

    Is it really bad luck to wear green to a wedding? I have never heard that before… off to investigate! Before I go… hilarious answers!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango July 14, 2021 / 10:48 pm

      I had never heard of that before either. The only thing I heard is that it’s bad form for any woman other than the bride to wear white.

      Liked by 1 person

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