They’d been a pair since college, and as far as she knew, each had been faithful to the other throughout their almost forty years together. However, between Albert’s sleep apnea and his terrible borborygmus, Henrietta had reached her wits’ end.
“Albert,” Henrietta said, I can’t take this anymore. If it’s not your incessant snoring that’s keeping me awake all night long, it’s those godawful gurgling noises coming from your gut. I can’t remember the last time I got a decent night’s sleep. I’m exhausted.”
“I’m so sorry, Henrietta,” Albert said,” but there’s nothing I can do about either my snoring or my borborygmus. I’ve been to the doctor about them and he says he’s at a loss.”
The wily old woman looked at her husband. “Albert,” she said. “You’ve got two options. You either move into the guest room and sleep there or you move out of the house.”
“Well, dammit,” Henrietta,” Albert said. “I don’t like either of those options.”
“Okay then, Albert,” Henrietta said. “There’s actually a third option. You can continue to sleep in our bedroom, but I’m telling you right now that if you keep me awake for just one more night, you’re going to turn me into a widowmaker.”
Written for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (pair), MMA Storytime (faithful), Word of the Day Challenge (borborygmus), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (wily), Your Daily Word prompt (actual), and Ragtag Daily Prompt (widowmaker).