FFfPP — Splash

You said it would be wonderful
You said it would be tranquil, serene
You said the scenery would be stunning
You begged me to come with you
You said there’s nothing better
You said I would love it

I didn’t want to go
I don’t like to fish
I’m tired and soaked
I’m chilled to the bone
I can’t see a damn thing
I hate this

You said we could leave if I wasn’t thrilled
Well, I’m not thrilled
I’m feeling seasick
So let’s leave now

What do you mean “man overboard”?
I’m not a man
I’m your wife
What are you doing?
Take your hands off of me
You know I can’t swim


Written for Roger Shipp’s Flash Fiction for the Purposeful Practitioner. Photo credit: Morguefile April 2020.

Like, Respect, Admire, Whatever

Rory is at it again with another one of his Friday Four thingamajigs. This time he is asking questions about what the words “like,” “respect,” and “admire” mean to us. He wants to know:

What is more important to you — to be “Liked” or to be “Respected”?

Like me. Respect me. Don’t like me, Don’t respect me. Whatever. I don’t care one way or the other. I like and respect myself, and that’s all that really matters, isn’t it?

What do you believe to be the difference between admiration and respect? Or do you find them to be the same?

I think the two are closely related. When you admire someone, you hold them in high regard, great esteem, approve of them for who they are, and, yes, respect them. But I believe that you can respect someone without admiring them. What do I mean by that? Well, I can respect someone’s accomplishments, but not necessarily admire them as a human being. Take Elon Musk, for example. I respect what he’s accomplished with electric cars (Tesla), battery backup systems for solar energy, and even his private space program (SpaceX). But I think he’s an asshole and I don’t admire him at all. On the other hand, he doesn’t even know that I exist, so it’s fair to say that he neither respects nor admires me.

Likability and friendship are two different things. Being likable to many is great, but being a great friend to a few (or one) is rare. What do you think of that statement: true or false, agree or disagree?

I think it’s generally true. I like a lot of people — but to be honest, I probably dislike more people than I like. On the other hand, I’m close friends with a select few people. And it’s those select few who matter to me more than all the other people that I like combined.

How uniquely YOU are you in a world  filled with variations of you anyway? What separates YOU from the rest of the world and makes you “Youniquely You”?

Okay, there is nothing truly unique about me. Seriously, there are nearly 8 billion people on planet Earth and I’d have to be pretty full of myself to think that I am truly unique. That said, I can, at times, be rather full of myself. Oh no, wait. People say it’s shit that I’m full of.

Fibbing Friday — Feeling Blue

Fibbing FridayFrank (aka PCGuy) and Di (aka Pensitivity101) alternate as host for Fibbing Friday, a silly little exercise where we are to write a post with our answers to the ten questions below. But as the title suggests, truth is not an option. The idea is to fib a little, a lot, tell whoppers, be inventive, silly, or even outrageous, in your responses. Today is Di’s turn to host and here are her questions.

1. Why is Royal Blood considered blue?

Because red-blooded sounds too American and there is no such thing as royalty in America. (Well, at least until Donald Trump has attempted to declare himself king.)

2. What is a Blue Moon?

A brand of beer.
3. What was the song ‘Blue is the Color’ about?

The color blue. Duh!

4. What is meant by blue collar?

It’s when a man’s favorite shirt’s collar is so dirty and frayed that it makes its owner feel blue at having to throw the shirt away.

5. What is a blue bonnet?

A brand of margarine.
6. What did Little Boy Blue play?

The blues on a saxophone, of course.

7. What changed from brown to blue according to the song?

The color of my girlfriend’s eyes after she put on her blue-tinted contact lenses.

8. Where will you find a Blue Nun?

On the label of a bottle of wine.

9. Why mustn’t you step on his Blue Suede Shoes?

You might turn them from blue suede to brown suede, especially if your feet are muddy.

10. What kind of bird has blue feet?

The bluebird of happiness.


Friday Fictioneers — Evil Spirits

“Mother, why do we have all of these garlic strings hanging in various places all around our home,” Gloria asked.

“They protect our home,” Beatrice answered.

“Protect it from what?” Gloria asked.

“From evil beings,” Beatrice answered. “The church believes that garlic is apotropaic and is able, therefore, to ward off evil spirits.”

“What kinds of evil spirits?” Gloria asked.

“Vampires and werewolves,” Beatrice said.

“Does garlic really repel vampires and werewolves?” Gloria asked.

“Have you seen any in our home?” Beatrice asked.

“No.” Gloria said.

“Well, there you go,” Beatrice smiled. “The church is always right.”

(97 words)

Written for this week’s Friday Fictioneers prompt from Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Photo credit: Dale Rogerson.

Time for a Test

Covid-19 testI’m walking my dog; she’s walking hers. I don’t know her name or anything about her, but she lives in the house next door to the house directly across the street from mine.

Trying to be neighborly, I wave and say hello. She says hello back to me. “How are you?” I ask.

She says, “Fine, thanks, and you?”

“Doing okay,” I say.

She says, “I just got back from visiting my son. He’s a freshman in college.”

“That’s nice,” I say.

She says, “He’s under quarantine. He and his girlfriend both tested positive for the coronavirus.”

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that,” I say.

She says, “But we had a nice visit nonetheless.”

“I hope you wore a mask during your visit,” I say.

She says, “Oh, was I supposed to do that?”

“Did you get tested?” I ask.

She says, “No need, I feel fine.”

“Gotta run,” I say, as I pull on my dog’s leash and leave abruptly.

I have an appointment to get a COVID-19 test later today.