Three Rhetorical Questions

I found this post that I had originally drafted on January 6, 2019 in my drafts folder when I was responding to the latest Blogging Insights post from Dr. Tanya, where she asked us how many posts we had in our drafts folder.

In my response, I said that I had six posts in my drafts folder and admitted that five were trashworthy. But I wrote, “One was from January 2019 where I posed three rhetorical questions. I forgot about that draft and might go back, reread it, and perhaps post it.”

Well, here it is. Let me know if you think this draft post was, indeed, trashworthy or if it was good enough to see the light of day.


Three very important questions occurred to me last night as I was trying, unsuccessfully, to fall asleep.

The first question relates to cat behavior.

Why, when we have all kinds of cat scratching posts and cat scratching toys, does our cat prefer to scratch our furniture?

Seriously, I don’t get it. We have four different types of cat scratching stations around our house and he basically ignores them all. He doesn’t mind perching himself atop any of the scratching posts, but he doesn’t seem to want to actually scratch the posts, which are designed to encourage cat scratching.

Instead, he loves scratching the shit out of our dining room chairs. And when it comes to rugs, fuhgeddaboudit. We do not have a single area rug left that is not full of pulls and snags.

The second question is about microwave ovens and WiFi.

Why, when I turn on my microwave oven to heat up some coffee or to warm up something to eat, does it always interfere with the WiFi signal from the modem/router to my laptop?

As soon as I press the start button on the microwave oven, I get disconnected from the internet. Every time.

And there doesn’t seem to be a damn thing I can do about it.

I’ve tried everything, including putting my microwave oven inside a cabinet and taping aluminum foil to the inside of the cabinet door. No help at all.

[FYI, I moved to a new house this past February, a year to the day after I saved this draft post, and I’m happy to say that my microwave oven no longer interferes with my WiFi signal. Yay!]

The third question deals with Chinese fortune cookies.

I was having dinner at a local Chinese restaurant with my daughter the other night. When the waitress brought the check at the end of our meal, it was accompanied by two fortune cookies.

My daughter opened hers first and laughed when she read it. It said, “You will inherit an unexpected sum of money within a year.”

I wished her luck with that and then opened up my fortune cookie and read my “fortune” aloud. It said, “The wise thing to do is to prepare for the unexpected.”

My daughter cracked up and said, “Dad, please don’t think that I’m wishing for you to die within the year, but I would encourage you to make sure your will is up to date. You know, in case of the unexpected.”

Was this part of some kind of vast Chinese fortune cookie conspiracy?

These questions are rhetorical. That means I’m not looking for answers from any of you. I’m just wondering out loud.

So go ahead and go about your business.

37 thoughts on “Three Rhetorical Questions

  1. cagedunn September 2, 2020 / 5:38 pm

    Rhetorical or not, the cat scratches the things with your smell on them, and the posts don’t have that. Rub your sweaty hands all over the posts on a regular basis and you may end up with reasonable furniture.
    Promise (almost).

    Liked by 3 people

    • amoralegria September 2, 2020 / 8:43 pm

      I’ve never heard of that either. We solve the problem by draping spreads over our chairs or taping aluminum foil on the tempting side of the couch. Our cat does use her scratching post, though. I rub catnip on it to encourage her. But your idea is interesting. I might try it!

      Liked by 2 people

      • cagedunn September 3, 2020 / 2:22 am

        The more we try to claim them, the more the cat demands it be marked as property of cat. And they have a sense of smell that’s better than dogs (if only we could train them to do good …).

        Liked by 1 person

  2. newepicauthor September 2, 2020 / 6:21 pm

    Was this post made with the classic editor? I think that there is a way to copy an old post and if you can copy a few of your old classic editor posts, then you may be able to use them to make new ones. Let me know if that works for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango September 2, 2020 / 10:22 pm

      It was originally written using the classic editor via wordpress.com on the Safari browser on my iPhone. Unfortunately, that classic editor is no longer available. But I was able to use the WordPress iOS all on my iPhone, which has what I call “classic editor lite,” when I started to edit this draft. So I didn’t have to use the fucking block editor to post this.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. whatifweallcared September 2, 2020 / 6:38 pm

    The errant WiFi signal caused by escaping radiation from the microwave has caused the cat to worship the scratching posts and loath your possessions! Martians write the fortunes and are coming for you soon… begin packing carefully 🧞‍♀️👾👽🛸🥠😹🛋️

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Paula Light September 2, 2020 / 6:45 pm

    Our cats scratch on the scratching posts but one also likes to claw the sofa 🐱🐱

    Liked by 3 people

    • Fandango September 2, 2020 / 10:26 pm

      When we moved in February, I threw out the fabric covered dining room chairs and got leather ones to replace them. For some reason, he doesn’t go after leather, but all other upholstered furniture and rugs are fair game for him.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Sadje September 2, 2020 / 6:46 pm

    Cats do as cats want! And just like babies, they want to mess with things that aren’t for them. As for the microwave and WiFi, well my cable tv jams for a minute or so when I turn the fan on or off! No logic or science to it. Fortune cookies are purely random!

    Liked by 3 people

  6. RuthScribbles September 2, 2020 / 7:25 pm

    Cats have a way. Look at the texture of where the cat scratches… mine loved the carpet, so the scratcher had to be carpet… they also loved the rough texture couch covers. So cardboard scratchers works. But you gotta train them. If interested I have a book to recommend.

    Liked by 3 people

    • amoralegria September 2, 2020 / 8:45 pm

      Yes, the corrugated cardboard ones, I find, work better than the ones with carpet on them. She doesn’t scratch the carpet, although she does have an affinity for Oriental rugs that cost a lot of money – those are her favorite textures!

      Liked by 2 people

    • Fandango September 2, 2020 / 10:29 pm

      My cat is 13. I’m not sure he’s trainable at this stage.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. drtanya@saltedcaramel September 2, 2020 / 7:34 pm

    This post was definitely worth publishing and not in the least “trashworthy”
    I am glad you found it and shared it with us. it was a fun read and quite relatable since everyone’s life is full of such unexplained phenomena.
    Cat’s we all know are contrary creatures.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. imagineambition September 2, 2020 / 8:20 pm

    Cats typically have a texture preference for scratching. So if there posts are wrong but the furniture is right… Bye bye furniture.

    Thanks for the laugh. Your microwave sorry made me laugh for some reason.

    So did the fortunes. Did you every play the “in bed” game with the fortunes. Read the fortune and add the words, “in bed,” to the end of fortunes. Totally leaned that from friends in high school. But it can still be funny today.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Fandango September 2, 2020 / 10:44 pm

      My kids, when they were in their mid to late teens, used to add “in bed” to everything and it would always crack them up!

      Like

  9. Marleen September 2, 2020 / 10:12 pm

    For the microwave/wi-fi situation, I was thinking tinfoil hat. But you’ve got it solved already. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Mister Bump UK September 2, 2020 / 11:28 pm

    Raised a smile at least. That’s what it’s all about. Hope daughter inherited something, even if not from mum or dad!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. bushboy September 3, 2020 / 3:39 am

    The last fortune cookie I had was “that wasn’t chicken” 😀 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  12. pensitivity101 September 3, 2020 / 10:31 am

    If cat behaviour is anything like dog behaviour, you have my sympathies.
    Every time the microwave dings, Maggie thinks it’s for her (so far she hasn’t interfered with the WIFI)
    The Chinese fortune cookies we’ve had are probably related to the Christmas Cracker factories.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango September 3, 2020 / 8:02 pm

      As a cat owner AND a dog owner, I can tell you that cat behavior and dog behavior are not at all alike.

      Like

      • pensitivity101 September 4, 2020 / 12:12 am

        Depends Fandango. I admit I have more experience with dogs than cats, but have seen both with similar traits, especially when they have been brought up together. They says dogs have owners and cats have staff. I can believe that too!! Thanks for the comment.

        Liked by 1 person

  13. Hetty Eliot September 3, 2020 / 12:16 pm

    I think cats prefer furniture bc it’s heavy and doesn’t budge when they’re really putting muscle into it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango September 3, 2020 / 10:21 pm

      We have some sturdy and heavy cat scratching posts that are pushed up against a wall, but you may be right.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. leigha66 September 8, 2020 / 9:01 pm

    I think they are definitely post worth Questions! I can so relate to the cats scratching!

    Liked by 1 person

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