“Was that a knock?” Brenda asked.
“Don’t answer it,” Dave insisted.
“Why not?”
“Because we’re not expecting anyone.”
Brenda ignored Dave, went to their apartment door and looked through the peephole. “It’s the guy from Federal Express,” she called out to Dave. “Can I help you?” she asked.
“I have a delivery for you,” he said.
“Who’s it from, we weren’t expecting anything.”
“I don’t know, ma’am,” he responded. “I just deliver.”
“Okay, leave it by the door,” Brenda said.
“Fine,” he responded and walked away.
Brenda looked over at Dave. “Can you go out and get it?” she asked him.
Clearly annoyed, Dave got up and went to the door. He opened it, picked up the box, and brought it inside their apartment, kicking the door shut behind him. “Jeez, this is heavy,” he said.
Excited, Brenda examined the large package. She tore open the box and the started to squeal. Dave came running over to her. “Are you okay? What is it?”
“Oh my God,“ Brenda screamed. “This is a genuine Dyrpirh!”
“A what?”
“A Dyrpirh,” she said. “I told my mother we were running low on toilet paper and we are in the midst of this pandemic and can’t get any. She said she’d help us out. But instead of toilet paper, she sent us a freakin’ Dyrpirh!”
“But what is it?”
“What is it?” Brenda exclaimed. “It’s a state-of-the-art toilet-top bidet with a heated seat, temperature controlled water spray, and a warm air drying element. Who needs toilet paper when you have a Dyrpirh?” she gleefully said.
Written for two Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie prompts. The Tale Weaver Making Sense of Nonsense prompt where we’re asked to write a story using the nonsense word “Dyrpirh,” and the First Line Friday prompt where the first line is “Was that a knock?” Also for Fandango’s One-World Challenge (express).