Five Lines or Less — Late Night Comedy in the Trump Era

Colbert jokes about TrumpI used to enjoy watching the late night comics on TV making fun of and joking about Donald Trump.

They provided much needed comic relief from the clusterfuck that is Trump’s reign.

But I’ve reached the point where I just don’t find it funny anymore.

The damage Trump and his GOP cronies have done to our nation may be beyond repair.

Leaving me wishing and hoping that this nightmare will end and I can start enjoying the late night comics once again.

5 linesThis is written for the Friday Five Lines or Less prompt from Patricia’s Place. The idea is to write a story or poem of five lines or less. This week’s word is “wishing.”

A Day of Reckoning

Outdoor wedding“Oh my God, Jimmy,” Jenny screamed, “I can’t believe you showed up to our wedding naked. What are you thinking?”

“I thought Dan said you were holding the ceremony at a naturist setting, so I assumed everyone would be in a state of nakedness.”

“Jimmy, you’re an idiot,” Dan said. “I said a natural setting, not a naturist setting! Now either you get your naked body the hell out of here on your own or I’m going to personally oust you. Do you understand me?”

“I’ll go, Dan,” Jimmy said, “but you and I are going to have a day of reckoning for our friendship one day very soon, buddy.”

Written for these daily prompts: The Daily Spur (wedding), Word of the Day (naked), Daily Addictions (state), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (either), Your Daily Word Prompt (oust), and Ragtag Daily Prompt (reckoning).

Friday Fictioneers — Why?

“Where did you find that contractor you hired to do the work on our vacation house?” Lauren asked her husband.

“On Craigslist,” Dave said. “Why?”

“When was the last time you went the house?”

“Sunday. Why?”

“When was the last time you spoke with the contractor?”

“Last week. Why?”

“You should go check on the house.”


“I went there earlier today and the contractor was not there and the house is a mess,” Lauren said. “I took a picture with my phone.”img_0563Dave grabbed the phone and looked at the photo. “Damn, I paid him upfront.”

“Why?” Lauren asked.

(100 words)

Written for this week’s Friday Fictioneers prompt from Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Photo credit: Mikhael Sublett.

Wanna Know You Better

36CA7A53-433F-4565-96D6-B8AD4823833CJames A. Best, over at MYplace3187, has tagged me to participate in something called “Wanna Know You Better.”

The idea is for you to create your own post and title it “Wanna Know You Better. Then mention me, Fandango, as the one who nominated you and link back here to this post. I will ask 10 “briefly explain” questions and 10 “this or that” questions. Copy all the questions and answer them one by one. Then pass this along as a challenge to any of your favorite bloggers and mention them in your post. You may create your own questions for those you tag if you want to.

So, are you ready?

10 “briefly explain” questions:

  1. What really makes you angry? Donald Trump and all of his Republican sycophants and enablers.
  2. What is your favorite food that you cannot do without? Does coffee count as food?
  3. What is your biggest fear? That Donald Trump will not be impeached by the House of Representatives, or if he is, that he will be acquitted by the Senate and not be removed from office, that he will be re-elected, or, if he’s not, that he will refuse to accept the results of the election and will not leave, and domestic chaos will ensue and the United States will end up in another civil war.
  4. What has been your biggest accomplishment this year? That it’s almost the end of the year and I’m still among the living.
  5. If you could live any where in the world, where would that be? I’ve never been there, but from what I’ve seen, heard, and read, New Zealand.
  6. What is your favorite method to relieve stress? Reading and listening to music, especially after having eaten a marijuana infused marshmallow.
  7. Would you rather live on the Moon or on Mars for two years? I’ll pass on both, thank you very much.
  8. What is your favorite type of weather? Sunny and cool, pretty much like most of the time in San Francisco.
  9. What is your favorite sport to play or watch? I’m beyond the age of playing sports, but in terms of watching, Major League Baseball, the National Football League, and NBA and college basketball.
  10. Do you enjoy creative efforts to attract readers to your blog? I do try to be creative, engaging, and provocative on my blog and I hope that readers enjoy my efforts.

10 “this or that” questions:

  1. Beach or Mountains? Mountains
  2. Fish or fried chicken wings? Chicken wings
  3. Sydney or Rio De Janeiro? Sydney
  4. Swimming or climbing hills? These days, swimming
  5. Steak or Lamb? Steak
  6. Summer or Winter? Summer in San Francisco
  7. Countryside or city? City
  8. Spring or Autumn? Autumn
  9. Political Science or Statistics? Political science
  10. A Train or Airplane Ride? Train

Okay, I’m going to tag a few bloggers to answer these same questions.

No pressure, Paula, Melanie, Sadje, Jim, or Rory. Participate at your option.

Fandango’s Friday Flashback — December 13

Wouldn’t you like to expose your newer readers to some of you earlier posts that they might never have seen? Or remind your long term followers of posts that they might not remember?

Each Friday I will publish a post I wrote on this exact date in a previous year.

How about you? Why don’t you reach back into your own archives and highlight a post that you wrote on this very date in a previous year? You can repost your Friday Flashback post on your blog and pingback to this post. Or you can just write a comment below with a link to the post you selected.

If you’ve been blogging for less than a year, go ahead and choose a post that you previously published on this day (the 13th) of any month within the past year and link to that post in a comment.

This was originally posted on December 13, 2012 in my now defunct blog. Also note that when this post was written, we hadn’t yet moved to our current house, which is just three blocks from Golden Gate Park.

Dog Duties

Dog ownership has its rewards, like the unconditional love and eager companionship you get from your pooch. It also has its challenges, such as walking the beast three or four times a day in all kinds of weather and gathering up its poops in little, eco-friendly, compostable bags.

Before we moved to San Francisco, our neighborhood back east offered plenty of grassy areas where our dog could do her thing during her daily walks. And, of course, in deference to our neighbors, we would always pick up afer her using those aforementioned poop bags.

But dog ownerhship when living in the heart of a large urban center has even more challenges, especially when it comes to finding suitable places for your dog to do its bidness in the concrete and asphalt jungle where you live. While there are trees planted in small square plots along many of the sidewalks — thanks to a local organization, Friends of the Urban Forest — there are no expansive lawns anywhere.

Large, grassy areas are not just around the corner, either. A nice, dog-friendly (read: off-leash permitted) park with great views of San Francisco Bay and Alcatraz is about five blocks to the northeast of where we live. Another, slightly larger park with spectacular views of downtown San Francisco is nine blocks southeast.
853E15DA-09B1-43B5-8642-C4B4408457C4The closest grassy area that doesn’t require climbing steep hills to get to is a not-so-dog-friendly athletic field four blocks away. The athletic field has a sign that specifically prohibits dogs from the field.

I guess I can understand that. If I had a kid playing soccer on that field, I wouldn’t want him or her to trip and land face-first in a pile of dog poop.

Still, we do take our dog to that field and allow her to poop when she has to, but we have our disposable poop bags with us at all times and diligently clean up after her. Hey, it’s a messy job, but someone has to do it.

There’s also the option of getting into the car and taking the five minute drive to Golden Gate Park. Or we could head to Land’s End, Crissy Field, or the Presidio (just west, east, and south of the Golden Gate Bridge, respectively). We could drive for ten minutes to Ocean Beach or to other green and dog-friendly venues in and around the city.

But that means, well, getting in the car. We often do take our dog in the car for her late afternoon outing. But at most other times, we walk her to either the small park to the north or the athletic field to the south of our place.

What has surprised me, though, is that in San Francisco, a bastion of individual freedom and personal independence, I’ve run across so many signs of intolerance when it comes to our canine friends.

And by “signs of intolerance,” I’m speaking quite literally about physical signs, both the informal, hand-crafted kind and official, professional ones.
C4234E51-1A58-4E26-84CA-0F7803DACC56But my favorite hand-made sign is this one warning dog owners that “dog duties” are not allowed. Hmm. I wonder what specific duties the sign-maker was thinking about?AE34A0AF-8ED8-4DEB-9240-A1854C9D628D