How to Calm an Angry King

E0022747-1902-417E-900A-351806D21F31The king took off his shoe and started pounding it on the table. “I am sick and tired of this jumble of patchwork laws that parliament has tried to foist upon my monarchy,” he bellowed. “There is no antecedent that can justify this assault on the crown!”

“You must calm down, my dear,” the queen said. “I’ve brought you a glass of warm milk to help you relax.”

“You never cease to surprise me, my darling,” the king said, kissing his wife’s hand. “How you remain so upbeat in the face of all this strife and chaos is beyond me.”

The queen stood up, winked at the king, turned her back on him, and asked, “My lord, can you help me with my zipper? And then, if you follow me to my boudoir, I’ll offer you a respite from the strife and chaos, my sire, that will make you feel quite upbeat and help you release all of your tension.”

Written for today’s Three Things Challenge from Di, aka Pensitivity101, where the three things are patchwork, milk, and shoe.

Also for these daily prompts: Ragtag Daily Prompt (jumble), Your Daily Word Prompt (antecedent), Word of the Day Challenge (queen), The Daily Spur (surprise), Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (upbeat), and Daily Addictions (zipper).

Three Line Tales — The Simple Things

6197F123-82D6-4322-A0C2-4455B35160F4My wife came back from the pet store carrying a cardboard box full of cat toys and goodies for the new kitty we just brought home from the shelter.

My wife took all of the items out of the box and carefully laid them all out on the floor, eager to see which ones the kitty wanted to play with.

My wife watched with dismay as the kitty looked over and sniffed the lined-up goodies, but passed them all up for the cardboard box, which she jumped into and mockingly peered at us just over the box’s top edge.

Written for Sonya’s Three Line Tales. Photo credit: Eberhard Grossgasteiger at Unsplash.

The Monday Peeve — Trash Talk

Paula Light has a new prompt. She calls it “The Monday Peeve” (aka, “TMP”), and the idea, Paula says, is to give us an opportunity to vent, to blow off a little steam at the beginning of the week.

Alrighty then. I’m going to vent/blow off some steam by doing some trash talk. I’m an urban dweller and one of the prices we urban dwellers pay for the convenience of living in the middle of all the action is the high concentration of other human beings living in close proximity and the volume of trash they generate.

Most people put their trash in proper receptacles, like trash bins. But there are some people who seem to just drop their trash, well, wherever. Yesterday, while walking the our dog, we came across this:D99FE793-4375-445D-843D-B64CDC0366A1I mean what the hell, people? The city provides large trash receptacles every three or four blocks. Are you too damn lazy to carry your trash to one of them? Or to take your garbage home with you and put it in your own trash bin? Instead you just drop it anywhere on the sidewalk? WTF is wrong with you?

If I ever see anyone just drop their trash in the street, I’m going to pick it and run up to them and dump it on their heads.

Okay. I feel much better now. Thank you, Paula.

Share Your World — I Hear You, But Am I Listening?

Share Your WorldThis week, Melanie is stealing borrowing questions posed by other bloggers for her Share Your World prompt.

Are we losing the art of listening in comparison to simply hearing?

F80CF77A-297B-4312-A206-4C9F1E5C1745I’m sorry, I didn’t hear your question. Either that or I wasn’t listening. I do remember something my debate teacher told me in high school. He said “Listen for understanding, not for rebuttal.” This has nothing to do with the question, but I like the message. Do you hear me? Are you listening?

How often do you openly discuss with friends or here in WP with your readership topics that make you feel uncomfortable or may be taboo or stigma laden?

I don’t shy away from discussing controversial topics, either in real life or on WordPress. As to taboo and/or stigma laden, well, I’m not sure how to draw the line between controversial and taboo/stigma-laden.

Do you think that these discussions should be freely discussed and written about more?

I think discussions of controversial topics such as religion and politics should be encouraged. As to taboo or stigma-laden subjects, until I know what that really means, I can’t really answer this question.

Did you have a nickname as a child and if so, what was [or what is it now]?

I was tall and skinny as a kid, and my best friend’s father used to call me “string bean” and “scarecrow.” I’m no longer exceptionally tall nor am I skinny.

Why is there still ‘stuff’ we simply just don’t understand despite our progressive world?

There will always be “stuff” that we don’t fully understand. That’s why we invented gods.

Would you rather double your height or lose half your weight?

So would I rather be almost 12 feet tall or weigh 85 pounds? Seriously?

What is your most essential kitchen tool?

My coffee maker.

Who is one blogger you really admire and why?

I admire a lot of bloggers, so it’s difficult (and unnecessary) for me to try to pick just one. Sorry, Melanie.

Weekly Song Challenge — Numbers Game

  • Musical Notes

For this week’s Weekly Song Challenge, Laura has asked us to post three videos about songs and numbers.

Her rules are:

  • Copy the rules and add them to our own post, pinging back to Laura’s post.
  • Post music videos for our answers to the musical questions.
  • Tag two people anyone who wants to participate!

So here goes.

1. Post a video of a song by a band with a number in their name.

How about Maroon 5?

2. Post a song by a one-hit wonder.

Let’s hear it for Dexys Midnight Runners.

3. Post a video of a song that has a number in lyrics and/or title.

Hmm. I guess I could also have chosen this group for the first question, too.

Okay, your turn!