They Just Disappear

Visualization of poof sound with big fluffy cloudIn the 26 months that I’ve had this blog, at least ten bloggers who I follow, and maybe as many as twice that number, have disappeared. As in “here today, gone tomorrow.” Most of these disappearing bloggers offered no notice of or explanation for their departure from the blogosphere. Just poof and they were gone.

Did they just get tired of blogging and quit? Did they lose interest? Are they having health issues? Do they have pressing personal masters to attend to? Will they be back at some point? Well, if they just disappeared one day, we likely will never know.

In a way, especially if the blogger is one you’ve followed for a long time and whose words, wit, and insights you appreciated, the blogger’s sudden disappearance is like losing a friend. A friend you “spoke” with frequently. A friend with whom you shared thoughts, ideas, perspectives, and opinions via blog posts and comments.

So it’s no wonder that these bloggers who are, for whatever reasons, no longer blogging, are missed in much the same way you miss a real world friend who inexplicably disappears without warning or explanation.

And that brings me to some sad news I received the other day about a blogger that I haven’t been following that long and really didn’t know very well outside of her comments on my posts and her prompts.

Hélène Vaillant, the blogger behind the “What Do You See?” prompt, passed away. Although I didn’t really know her that well, I felt the loss of her sudden and unexpected death not that differently from how I would feel about the death of a real world acquaintance.


34 thoughts on “They Just Disappear

  1. Frank Prem July 24, 2019 / 5:24 pm

    Well said, Fandango. I also didn’t know her so very long, but so very much appreciated what she did with her blog and her contribution, generally and to myself directly.


    Liked by 1 person

  2. Jen Goldie July 24, 2019 / 5:37 pm

    Thank you for posting the news. I knew she wasn’t well at all. After her husband passed as recently as a month ago her health deteriorated. The last message I saw from her wasn’t positive at all about her health. She was such a vibrant woman. 😢 Rest in Peace Helene ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  3. July 24, 2019 / 5:40 pm

    Oh… I had no idea that Helene passed away, I had wondered what happened to her for the last month. How sad, she was such a lovely lady. She was such an inspiration and so very kind. I will definitely miss her.
    Thank you for sharing this information… May Helene Rest in Peace. 😢 🙏

    Liked by 1 person

  4. newepicauthor July 24, 2019 / 5:52 pm

    I didn’t really know Hélène Vaillant but I wrote a few times in her Willow Poetry which was always fun. It is sad and I will miss her. Blogging as I see it is for older people as younger people have much better things to do instead of writing. In the short time that I have been blogging here, I have noticed several bloggers just go poof. I guess that I do miss them like I would a real world friend however I don’t actually have any real world friends. What happened to Vandana? Sight and Sandy also disappeared. Some bloggers that I followed have been gone so long that I can’t even remember their names any more. Like that girl Aquarius Girl or something like that who gave you the name Dango which I picked up on, she was real funny. I guess if there is a Rock and Roll heaven, that there is probably a blogging heaven also.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Sadje July 24, 2019 / 5:52 pm

    Aw, that’s so sad. I knew that her husband had passed away a few months ago. But this is a shocking new.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. popsiclesociety July 24, 2019 / 6:15 pm

    This is sad! True! They disappear and we are asking ourselves what happened? How can we know if they just stopped blogging or are no longer with us? Sad 😦

    Liked by 1 person

  7. paeansunplugged July 24, 2019 / 6:16 pm

    So did I Fandango. I never responded to her prompts but enjoyed her posts and her generous comments on my posts. May she rest in peace. 🙏🏼

    Liked by 3 people

  8. ArtisanX July 24, 2019 / 6:33 pm

    OMG! I was wondering about her. She was so great to me when I started up again. Her advice was great and I really enjoyed our conversations, albeit short. I can’t agree with you more. And I don’t think many realize that they may not think it, but some of us really notice an unusual absence (ahem.. Jenn @witsend) There are so many that I have checked in on just to make sure. It’s funny that way, isn’t it?

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Paula Light July 24, 2019 / 6:47 pm

    I too enjoyed Helene’s blog and prompts. RIP, dear lady.

    Yes, I know what you mean about the disappearing bloggers. Some of “mine” are still around, but they hardly blog, which is sad (for me). At least I know where to find them. Others have just vanished.

    Liked by 2 people

  10. robertawrites235681907 July 24, 2019 / 9:22 pm

    I loved Helene’s poetry and was shocked by her death. Her dear husband passed a short while ago and it is not uncommon for a partner to follow in a short space of time.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. drtanya@saltedcaramel July 24, 2019 / 11:33 pm

    That is so sad.
    May she rest in peace.

    Although I probably not have been blogging long enough to notice people disappearing I have noticed another phenomenon.
    Some bloggers like or comment on your blog but when you click on their link it says the site has been deleted.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango July 25, 2019 / 12:11 am

      Sad indeed. And for what it’s worth, I’ve had that same thing with the blog not found happen to me. Maybe they changed their URL but the avatar that is associated with the comment did not get changed. Who knows?


  12. Marleen July 24, 2019 / 11:47 pm

    Lovely lady.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. sca11y July 25, 2019 / 12:20 am

    I’ve seen this from both sides.
    I once had a serious illness myself, and, really, the last thing on my mind was anything tech.So, the only people I knew were my very immediate family. Afterwards, I gradually contacted people and told them, I got several “oh, I wish I’d known” responses.
    As part of my own recovery I have time on my hands. I partially fill that by visiting the local hospital. Same ward that I was on. I’ve been doing it for a few years now. Staff write down a list of patients who they think might benefit from a chat. One of the things I’ve noticed is that I might be asked to speak to people two or three times, but never again. So, I’m always left wondering what eventually happened. A lot of people recover well enough to go on to some rehab facility, but I know the statistics. Some of them will have died. I decided that, for me, I’d just as soon not know. It’s sad that I don’t know the outcome, but it would be sadder if I knew that somebody I’d met a few times and kinda-knew a little, had died.

    Liked by 1 person

    • sca11y July 25, 2019 / 8:02 am

      the only people *who* knew

      Liked by 1 person

  14. pensitivity101 July 25, 2019 / 5:10 am

    I read this with sadness too, and like you had only recently come to know Helene through her prompts and kind comments. A sad loss indeed.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Christine Bolton July 25, 2019 / 5:53 am

    Yes, I will miss Hélène too. She was a sweet lady and worked very hard to capture all our responses every week, even though she was suffering the loss of her husband and then her own health. 😢
    I often wonder where people go. Are they on vacation or perhaps sick? Have they retired from blogging or just too busy to continue. I agree with you. In a way it is like losing a friend when you don’t know.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Suze July 25, 2019 / 6:54 am

    I knew Helene was so very lost without her husband and think she simply could not bear to be without him any longer. She will be very strongly missed.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. Mws R July 25, 2019 / 7:18 am

    Oh that is what I myself have pondered. Where are they?
    I guess we will never know…unless they make us privy to it.
    I have noticed that as well in the ines you use to follow faithfully…they we’re the ones I followed as well.

    I hate the part of life that takes dear people away from here. But in hindsight, I know they can be at peace and surrounded by those gone before.
    I’m sorry you were acquainted with this lady…and feel a loss.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. leigha66 July 25, 2019 / 8:15 pm

    I have seen a few disappearing acts… You do wonder what happened to them, especially if you knew they had problems. I am so sorry for your sadness from the loss to the blogging community. May she rest in peace.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Olga July 26, 2019 / 11:01 am

    R.I.P. Helene. 😦 She was a gentle soul.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Tessa July 26, 2019 / 7:24 pm

    I wondered about her. How sad. I loved her “What do you See” posts. RIP!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango July 26, 2019 / 8:30 pm

      I know. The pictures she chose certainly tickled the imagination.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Tessa July 27, 2019 / 3:59 pm

        Oh yes they were so different and I usually don’t get into to those types of prompts, but I could find something with those pictures she chose. I loved the 3 mermaid one and the dragon.

        Liked by 1 person

  21. blindzanygirl July 30, 2019 / 4:09 am

    Just so shocked. I only just found out today because I had missed her postings so went looking. She and I shared a lot about our cancers. I wrote something on Sue Vincent’s blog a few minutes ago. I missed this before Fandango but my sadness is immense. Rest in Peace dear Helene. I will always remember you.

    Liked by 2 people

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