Spy Versus Spy

BB3EDA1A-E3E8-41EC-B00B-A3C8C361DA91I’ve been getting some strange comments showing up in my spam folder lately. Like this one:

“Alex9, this message is your next piece of data. Immediately message the agency at your earliest convenience. No further information until next transmission. This is broadcast #5771. Do not delete.”

Sometimes, like above, the comment is addressed to “Alex9.” Sometimes it’s addressed to another mysterious, secret agent-like name. But the message is always the same.

And the cryptic wording is weird. “Immediately message the agency.” What agency? Are we talking CIA? FBI? MI6? Mossad? KGB? What?

And then there’s “…at your earliest convenience.” So what is it — immediately or at my earliest convenience? “…next transmission” “…do not delete.” Seriously?

Well, listen, whoever you are, I’ve got news for you. I never sent in an application to any of those spy agencies. You showed a serious lack of judgment sending this message to me. I may be an uncle, but I’m not The Man From U.N.C.L.E. As much as I’d like to, it’s not my job to eradicate evil in the universe or to stop the polar ice caps from melting.

So I’m going to ignore your directive to message the agency and I’m going to delete this spam comment forthwith. Over and out.


Written for these daily prompts: Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (news), The Daily Spur (judgment), Your Daily Word Prompt (eradicate), Word of the Day Challenge (universe), Ragtag Daily Prompt (Emmy), and for Rachel Poli’s Time To Write (application).

21 thoughts on “Spy Versus Spy

  1. Marleen July 19, 2019 / 2:18 pm

    “Over and out.” Lol

    Liked by 1 person

  2. D. Wallace Peach July 19, 2019 / 2:36 pm

    So funny. Wouldn’t it be great if spammers were just pranksters and comedians whose intention was to make us laugh? This comment will explode in 5 seconds.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. JT Twissel July 19, 2019 / 4:27 pm

    Sometimes those spam messages are quite bizarre – as though they were randomly generated. I like the spy angle though….

    Liked by 1 person

  4. sca11y July 20, 2019 / 1:47 am

    There’s gotta be a positive message in there somewhere. People will go to all sorts of ingenious lengths to entice people into reading their scam, yet you just post something, people read it quite willingly, “like” it, comment on it, and come back for more. What does that say?

    Liked by 1 person

      • sca11y July 20, 2019 / 1:12 pm

        Actually I’ve never worked for governments but have done some commercial work on security and encryption. Email is very porous, security-wise. I’d be surprised if any of the security services even used it, especially unencrypted. People could go out and buy a commercial add-on to encrypt their messages, but hardly anybody does.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Melanie B Cee July 20, 2019 / 8:55 am

    I fell over laughing. And sir, if I may insert a ‘brief’ comment? You ARE a spy. Hence the anonymity. I’m impressed the agency found you! Jason Bourne? Move over. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

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