I’ve Never Skied Naked

62f3e412-a061-49f0-bcab-4003b9716ea9.jpegThat is not me in the picture. Just to set the record straight, I have never in my life skied naked. Yet there is a rumor floating around the blogosphere that I have, indeed done so.

It all started when Rory (A Guy Called Bloke) posted about being nominated for the Sunshine Blogger Award. In that post, he included me in the group of bloggers he nominated to pay it forward and he posed a bunch of questions, the nature of which Rory is wont to ask (i.e., weird ones).

Being the accommodating blogger that I am, I wrote a post with my answers to Rory’s weird questions. That post is HERE.

Rory’s second question asked, “What’s the most fun you have ever had without the obvious, naked?” I interpreted Rory’s question to ask about the most fun I’ve had without being naked. And so I responded, “Without being naked? Um, downhill snow skiing at Taos in New Mexico?”

Think about what I wrote. I wrote, “Without being naked?” Maybe I misunderstood Rory’s question, but my response was clearly talking about not being naked. Am I right or what?

But apparently a number of bloggers glommed on to the notion that I skied naked. I figured this misconception would eventually fizzle out.

But no. Today, Mel, over at Crushed Caramel, “gifted” me with this pair of thermal underwear. 7ADB5CB0-32D5-4A88-A7EE-ECB209E1224AShe wrote, “My first priority is a gift to Fernando* Fandango, the creator of This, That, and The Other. I would like to give the gift of thermal underwear for skiers. Specialist skiers underwear that is also aerodynamic. It won’t slow you down on the ski slopes but it will help to prevent frost bite. Frostbite can turn very nasty, so please do wear something on the slopes.”

But I already do wear thermal underwear when I go skiing because I don’t sky naked!

So, once and for all, I’ve never skied naked. I’ve been naked at a nude beach, I’ve been skinny dipping at a flooded rock quarry, and I’ve frolicked in the altogether with friends in a hot tub. But skiing naked. Uh uh!

* Don’t ask.

71 thoughts on “I’ve Never Skied Naked

  1. Cyranny December 3, 2018 / 6:03 pm

    Are you sure? You are defending yourself quite energically… LOL I wasn’t aware of the FandangoSkyingNaked-gate, but after reading this, I have a feeling that you do enjoy the crisp breeze on your bare cheeks… Mouahahahahahahaha

    Liked by 4 people

  2. ArtisanX December 3, 2018 / 6:20 pm

    It’s ok. I was told the same. But I cannot be held accountable for my actions, in my early 20’s, where I may have been too influenced with liquid courage, to remember.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ArtisanX December 3, 2018 / 6:27 pm

      PS. Taos is one of my all time fave ski resorts, up there with Angel Fire, Purgatory, Sandia and Steamboat. Boy do I miss west coast skiing.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Marleen December 3, 2018 / 6:31 pm

    Oh. I thought you were giving us another peek at what you look like — without any identifiers. Figured I must’ve been confused by the original question. Whatever the case, I hope everyone is helping you to figure out what you’ve really done and how to reform your ways. (Actually, I’m glad you’re airing what this erroneous talk has been about.)

    Liked by 3 people

  4. writebrainwidow December 3, 2018 / 6:38 pm

    Sounds like your Elf on a Shelf had a head ski start on your holiday gift so I hope you use them well since naked would be a bit chilly on the slopes. Hey, there’s always the back yard if slopes aren’t doable. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Willow December 3, 2018 / 6:50 pm

    I’ve never skied at all. 🙂 Naked or otherwise. I have, however, done some of the other things you listed in your last paragraph. So there’s that.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Paula Light December 3, 2018 / 6:54 pm

    There was something in the air that night
    The stars were bright
    Fernando
    😂😂😂

    Liked by 4 people

  7. Sadje December 3, 2018 / 9:47 pm

    Finding it hard to live down the rumors! 😂😂😂

    Liked by 2 people

  8. El Rolyat December 3, 2018 / 11:20 pm

    Yeah?
    That’s exactly what someone who *has* skied naked would say.
    Just saying …

    Liked by 4 people

    • aguycalledbloke December 4, 2018 / 1:24 am

      Absolutely, poor ol’ Fandango is just making so much fuss in all this, there has to be truth in it. I envy you Fandango, you sure do have balls of brass my friend – be proud ……….. just saying 🙂

      Liked by 5 people

  9. All About Life December 3, 2018 / 11:45 pm

    I’m still looking at the picture………sorry what were you saying about skiing?? ;O) x

    Liked by 4 people

  10. crushedcaramel December 4, 2018 / 12:33 am

    Oh dear – I am laughing so hard. I shouldn’t be laughing at your expense.
    Oh my goodness, you are so great!

    I presumed, and I am sure I am right that whenever Rory refers to “the obvious” in one of his questions, he is talking about sex. I am sure he was asking about fun we have had whilst naked other than “the obvious”. My own reply to Rory’s question was about how I unintentionally exposed myself to a hospital ward.

    Your reply to Rory’s question definitely made the biggest impression!
    Well, we are very impressionable. We had never even heard of naked skiing before you!

    Liked by 3 people

  11. Renard Moreau December 4, 2018 / 12:33 am

    😀 You do not appear to be the type of person who will risk hypothermia.

    Have a great day, Fandango!

    Liked by 2 people

  12. aguycalledbloke December 4, 2018 / 1:28 am

    Look if it makes you feel easier Fandango, l have done a few things naked before, it’s about adventuring and seeing how far you can stretch certain parts of your body, no pun intended, because that could happen when skiing naked especially in the snow. I did water ski naked once, it was only once as l fell off onto my ass and had a huge burn on my bum, l went flying fox once naked and ended up with a splinter in the wood – yes think on that and many other bits and bots with nakedness, so be proud, stand tall or stiff if you prefer it! 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  13. aguycalledbloke December 4, 2018 / 2:00 am

    You know looking closely at the picture is it somewhat ironic that in the middle there is an upright ramrod of a pole in blue no less so must be jolly cold, l wonder how he skies with that in the way? surprised it doesn’t just topple him over?

    Very cleverly caught moment of photography l say or poor fellow must have a devil of a time walking around?

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Richmond Road December 4, 2018 / 3:26 am

    That Fandango doth protest too much, me thinks.

    But why? It seems he has beckoned more of us (via his Freudian confession) out upon the slopes to witness the majesty of nature and to commune with our fellows uninhabited by the restraints of thermal underwear.

    And one can only admire, of course, a naked man who can maintain his masculine self-confidence in sub-zero conditions.

    Liked by 4 people

  15. talesfromthemindofkristian December 4, 2018 / 6:56 am

    Hilarious! Myself, I don’t do naked. I’m not even naked under my clothes, I always wear lots of layers just in case I end up in an impromptu game of strip poker. I’m not going to be the one who shows his hand first 😉

    Liked by 3 people

      • Marleen December 4, 2018 / 9:53 am

        You know what they say about hands.

        Liked by 1 person

          • Marleen December 4, 2018 / 12:39 pm

            I have a pair of right-hand men’s ski gloves that perplexed me a little, yesterday. Seriously. I was trying to find a set for one of my sons (the one who is here from New zealand, where it’s warm right now).

            Who took two left-handed gloves, and when?
            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

            https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Physical_characteristics_of_the_Buddha
            After examining the cult of the Buddha image in India, Gregory Schopen concludes that followers of Mahāyāna at this time played little to no role in introducing statuary and other physical depictions of the Buddha.[6] Mahāyāna sūtras from this period such as the Maitreyasiṃhanāda Sūtra, only address the image cult as an object of criticism, if it is mentioned at all.[6] Schopen states that followers of Mahāyāna were generally uninterested in worshipping buddhas, but rather in becoming buddhas…

            Nevertheless, here is how you find a great man (in terms of hands):

            Long, slender fingers
            Well-rounded palms
            Smooth, soft hands
            (delicately soft skin)
            Finely webbed fingers

            Hands reaching below the knees ?OR? {must seek guru}
            Fingers reaching the knee (when hand is stretched down)

            He has pliant hands.
            He has beautiful fingers.
            He has fully-fleshed joints.
            He has tube-shaped fingers.
            His fingernails have a rosy tint.
            He has well-proportioned fingers.
            The lines on his palms are deep.
            The lines on his palms are long.
            The lines on his palms are straight.
            The lines on his palms have a rosy tint.
            His fingernails are slightly upturned at the tip.
            His fingernails are smooth and rounded without ridges.

            Not getting into wrists. That could be controversial.
            I’m not getting into sinews or tendons either.
            I started down this road when searching arms.

            Sorry. I know I’m w-w-a-a-a-a-y-y off topic.
            Oh, but there’s more. I’m not done here.

            Liked by 1 person

            • Marleen December 4, 2018 / 12:40 pm

              When we see and hear the suffering of others and respond to that suffering, we are the heads and arms of the bodhisattva. A Bodhisattva is one who delays enlightenment until all beings have been delivered of suffering. Many arms for the many ways to heal suffering.

              https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20121006015702AAHJzo3
              What is the buddha called with many arms [and what is it’s meaning]?

              Liked by 1 person

  16. JT Twissel December 4, 2018 / 10:00 am

    The University of Nevada Reno has a ski team and every winter they have a Snow Festival with Snow Princesses and a Snow Queen and they are required to ski in bikinis. Almost as bad as being naked…

    Liked by 2 people

    • Fandango December 4, 2018 / 10:34 am

      Hmm. When is this year’s festival? Reno’s a short drive.

      Liked by 2 people

      • JT Twissel December 4, 2018 / 11:05 am

        It used to be in the Spring but that was long ago, back when UNR was a notorious party school. Now they’re respectable

        Liked by 1 person

        • Fandango December 4, 2018 / 11:38 am

          Missed opportunity. Oh well. 😏

          Like

  17. Melanie B Cee December 4, 2018 / 12:40 pm

    DO you protest too much? Or are you telling the bald truth? *snicker* I tend to believe that you’ve never skied nekkid because I think you have too much pride in your fruits to freeze them in such an unseemly manner. But I’m also often wrong. And if you were proud to strut in the nude at all those other places, why not at a ski resort (in the hot tub perhaps?) You might tell folks you’re not an exhibitionist….but as witnessed by the plethora of comments – few would believe it. Still. Thanks for clearing that up! 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    • Fandango December 4, 2018 / 2:30 pm

      Well, in a hot tub, sure. Why not? But on skis? On a snow, icy ski slope traversing down at 30 miles per hour? I’d be too concerned about freezing my bits off. As to being a closet exhibitionist, I plead guilty. After all, we’re all human beings and, you know, you seen one, you’ve pretty much seen ‘em all. Well, sorta, anyway.

      Liked by 2 people

  18. rugby843 December 5, 2018 / 3:49 pm

    Between this and the music post, I think you are a dyed in the wool hippie. Well that’s what we used to call “them”. 😂 I love your sense of humor and what fun reading your blogs. Don’t stop! Ok, that reminds me of an old joke….🤗

    Liked by 1 person

  19. leigha66 December 9, 2018 / 8:30 pm

    Don’t think I can get any words out, I’m laughing so hard! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

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