Ten Questions

6227D322-1425-4604-9BC7-534B6ECE4211So Teresa over at The Haunted Wordsmith was nominated for the Liebster award. Good for her. It’s well-deserved. Then Teresa apparently drew my name out of a hat when following the rules that required her to nominate 5-11 other bloggers with fewer than 1,000 followers for the award.

Now some may consider this to be primitive of me, but my blog is an award-free blog. So while I can’t accept Teresa’s very kind nomination for the Liebster award, I can answer the ten questions she asked of those she nominated.

Here goes.

  1. If you could be any animal, what would it be? A werewolf. I’m already hairy and I love howling at the moon.
  2. Do you believe in fairy tales? No. I’m an atheist.
  3. What is your favorite movie/tv show? The Rachel Maddow Show. And don’t you dare judge me.
  4. What are you reading right now? This post.
  5. What is one movie people would be surprised to learn you like? My all-time favorite movie is Mel Brooks’ “Young Frankenstein,” but that wouldn’t surprise anyone who knows me.
  6. If you could trade places with anyone for a day, who would it be? Donald Trump. I’d fire my cabinet and resign before the end of the day.
  7. What advice would you give your younger self? Grow up!
  8. If you could swap blogs with someone, who would it be? Why would I wanna do that? My blog is da best. 🤪
  9. Name three places anywhere in the Universe that you would like to see up close. Uranus! No, I’m just kidding. I have no interest in seeing Uranus. What do you think I am — a proctologist? As to two other places, I dunno. Krypton and Dune.
  10. Dog, cat, fish, bird, reptile, small mammal, or no pet at all? A dog and a cat.

#coolprompts — Ironic

ironic-written-stoneRay, over at Rsynotbradbury.com has s new prompt that she’s calling #coolprompts. Today’s prompt is the word “ironic” and we’re supposed to write a post based on the word ‘ironic’ and use five more synonyms of the word ‘ironic’ in our posts. So here goes.

“Don’t you find it kind of ironic?” asked Margaret.

“I don’t know about ironic,” Sarah answered. “More unexpected than ironic.”

“Are you mocking me, Sarah?” Margaret said in a cynical way.

“Honestly, Margaret,” Sarah said, “I wasn’t being at all sarcastic.”

“Well, you coulda fooled me,” Margaret said. “You sounded pretty caustic.”

Sarah looked at Margaret. “You’re coming across as rather arrogant.”

“Me? You’re the one being ridiculous and hyper-critical,” Margaret said.

“Oh stop,” Sarah said.” I’m just bustin’ your chops, my dear. You know my wry wit. It can be biting, but it’s not meant to be disparaging.”

“Aren’t you the clever one,” Margaret responded.

“Now you’re being ironic,” Sarah said.

Both women started laughing.

A Very Short Story

Bell Tower“Let’s meet at Prince Street,” Jake said.

“You mean the Prince Street downtown or the one uptown?” Sam asked.

“Downtown,” responded Jake. “The one uptown is Princess Street.”

“Oh, right,” said Sam. “So where on Prince Street?”

“You know where the bell tower is?” Jake asked.

“Yeah, I think so,” said Sam.

“Okay, so we’ll meet at the bell tower on Prince Street downtown in an hour,” Jake confirmed.

Written for Teresa’s Three Things Challenge, where the words are prince, bell, and downtown.

Let It Bleed — Second Chance

373BAFA8-770C-4938-9260-40793E79ADA3“Thanks for meeting me,” Natalie said to Leela when she sat down at the table in the coffee shop.

“Well,” Leela said,” you said you had big news for me. What is it?”

Natalie leaned closer across the table toward Leela and said, “Hal and I split up.”

“Oh my God, Natalie,” Leela said. “When did this happen?”

“Hal moved out on Saturday,” Natalie said. “It all started a few months ago when a guy moved into the apartment on the floor below ours.”

“Go on,” Leela said.

“It turns out that the guy is a registered sex offender,” Natalie said.

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

“No, I’m serious,” Natalie said. “Anyway, the first time I saw him was at the building’s laundry room. He said hello to me and I thought he was kinda cute, so we struck up a conversation. He told me right away that he was a registered sex offender. He said it’s part of the public record and he didn’t want me to hear it from anyone else.”

“Is this going where I think it’s going?” Leela asked.

Natalie blushed a little and continued. “Of course I told Hal about the guy, but he was not at all happy about having a sex offender in our building. But I told Hal that the guy behaved like a perfect gentleman and that everyone deserves a second chance.”

“Natalie,” Leela said, “cut to the chase.”

“So I saw him a few more times in the laundry room,” Natalie explained. “And then he asked me if I wanted to have lunch with him, and I said yes. One thing led to another and suddenly we were in our apartment having sex like I’d never had before. And that was when Hal came home from work unexpectedly and caught us.”

“What happened?” Leela asked.

“Hal said ‘It’s him or me, Natalie,’ and I said, ‘It’s him.’”

“You are shitting me, right?” Leela said. “You chose a registered sex offender that you barely knew over your husband?”

Natalie leaned in close to Leela again and said, “Leela, sex with him was out of this world. Besides, he’s registered. Believe me, girl, unlike Hal, the man he knows what he’s doing.”

Written for this week’s Let It Bleed prompt from Saumya Agrawal over at Randomness Inked. The prompt is “second chance.”

FOWC With Fandango — Primitive

67C1685A-6334-4B54-9BB8-250FB930E4A9Welcome to June 4, 2018 and Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (aka, FOWC). It’s designed to fill the void after WordPress bailed on its daily one-word prompt.

I will be posting each day’s word just after midnight Pacific Time (US).

Today’s word is “primitive.” Write a post using that word. It can be prose, poetry, fiction, non-fiction. It can be any length. It can be just a picture or a drawing if you want. No holds barred, so to speak.

Once you are done, tag your post with #FOWC and create a pingback to this post if you are on WordPress. Or you can simply include a link to your post in the comments.

(I no longer have the Mister Linky thingie anymore since hardly anyone was using it.)