Excess Baggage

BBC36934-E0D4-4ABD-9C8F-003E589172A9“Simplify, simplify, simplify,” the life coach told the group of recent retires. “A complicated life is a troublesome life and in these, your golden years, troublesome is not what you want or need. Am I right?”

The group of about a dozen men and women attending the free AARP seminar at the local community center nodded in agreement.

“First, set your personal priorities,” the life coach said. “What matters to you the most? Is it your children or grandchildren? Do you love gardening? Have you always wanted to see the world?” Make a short list of the things that are most important to you and reduce or eliminate the time you spend on whatever is not on your short list.

“Second, you need to get rid of the clutter. Free yourself from all that junk you have gathered over the decades. Donate it to Goodwill. Sell it at a yard sale. Give it away. If you haven’t used something in the past year, you don’t need to keep it.

“And finally, spend time with people you care for and whom you love.”

A woman raised her hand and the life coach acknowledged her. The woman stood up and thanked the life coach for her suggestions. “I want to set my priorities, remove the clutter in my life, and spend more time with the people I love,” she said. “But I’ve got baggage. Can you help me get rid of my baggage?”

“I can try,” the life coach said. “What kind of baggage are we talking about?”

“My husband,” the woman answered.


Written for today’s one-word prompt, “simplify.”

8 thoughts on “Excess Baggage

  1. Sight11 February 9, 2018 / 9:55 am

    Oh man, that’s one hilarious post. Dammit what’s wrong with my sense of humour?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. newepicauthor February 10, 2018 / 9:42 am

    A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, ‘Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!’
    The husband said, ‘Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?’
    His wife replied, ‘It doesn’t matter, just get the hell out of my house.’

    Liked by 1 person

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