What Women Need to Know About Men

Image result for Men and women are different

You may find this hard to believe, but men and women are different, and not just in a superficial way. They think, feel, and behave differently. Men are relatively simple, straightforward beings. Women are complex, complicated organisms.

If you are a woman, here are a few hints that may help you to understand, relate to, and deal with us guys. If you are a man, feel free to add your own insights.

Are you ready?

Men are not mind readers. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

Ask directly for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work.
Strong hints to not work.
Obvious hints do not work.
Just say it.

“Yes” and “No” are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

Anything we said six months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after seven days.

If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.

If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant it the other way.

You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

Christopher Columbus did not need to ask for directions, and neither do we.

Most men see only primary colors. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” we will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

If you ask a question that you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer that you don’t want to hear.

When we have to go out somewhere, anything you wear is fine. Really.

Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.

You have enough clothes; you have too many shoes.

And finally, crying is not playing fair.

Written for today’s one-word prompt, “superficial.”

(Note: I had to republish this because, for some inexplicable reason, the first time it somehow disappeared.)

14 thoughts on “What Women Need to Know About Men

  1. geminilvr October 8, 2017 / 8:02 am

    Great post and so very true

    Liked by 2 people

  2. newepicauthor October 8, 2017 / 8:06 am

    My only complaint about women is there incessant need to always be talking. Wise men speak because they have something to say, but most women talk because they have to say something. If you need to constantly be saying something, them go call your mother.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango October 8, 2017 / 9:32 am

      Interesting take about men having something to say and women having to say something. I’m pretty sure most women won’t appreciate that distinction, though.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Marilyn Armstrong October 8, 2017 / 10:29 am

    Garry cares what I wear. Nobody is better than he is at picking flattering outfits for me, not to mention anyone who has the smarts to ask him. The man is a living, breathing clothes horse. Okay, not so much now when he has discovered elastic (once you find elastic, you will NEVER go back), but until retirement, he was the envy of everyone and he had a wardrobe to die for. What other people spent on fast cars? HE spent on clothing.

    And he is the absolute MASTER of prevarication and rationalization. He will NEVER answer a question directly.

    And he doesn’t like beer, but he sure does love sports.

    Liked by 4 people

  4. cagedunn October 8, 2017 / 2:18 pm

    I think you put up a mirror.
    Women can’t read the minds of men, either. when a man says ‘you know how I feel’ she knows he’s full of it. Telling a woman how to do something a man doesn’t do will get him killed (yep! scars to prove the attempts). Men who always attempt to take shortcuts can also get very lost (or even miss the opportunity to ‘see’ the things that happen in the not-short-cut). When a man isn’t careful about how he says something, he always blames the other person for not knowing what he meant.
    Hmmmm – I think I see some form of reflective element in this. Men and woman are so similar, maybe, that they make as many excuses to make themselves different that it all goes full circle.

    Liked by 1 person

          • cagedunn October 8, 2017 / 7:18 pm

            I wish! No. Pics go on the walls, the bathroom mirror is too small and too high (giving something away there – but not what you think), and couldn’t be bothered.

            Liked by 1 person

  5. Scott October 8, 2017 / 4:33 pm

    I like when you said yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers. That made me laugh because often I want a yes or no and the answer I get does not answer my question.

    Liked by 2 people

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