Standard Sub

Henry was watching the guy at Subway prepare his sandwich, a foot-long Italian BMT.

Henry was very particular about the way his sub sandwiches ought to be constructed. He watched carefully as his was being prepared. “More lettuce,” Henry demanded. “More olives, too.”

The sandwich maker glanced up at Henry but continued to work on the sub. When he had finished making the sandwich and was about to wrap it up, Henry told him to stop. Henry looked at the prepared sandwich and frowned. “This sub is substandard,” Henry said. “It’s definitely sub-par.”

“I’m sorry, sir,” the guy replied, “but this is our standard sub. I made it the standard way, but with extra lettuce and olives, as you requested.”

“Substandard!” Henry said in a very loud voice.

“Standard sub!” the guy behind the counter responded, in an equally loud voice.

“Who’s in charge here?” Henry demanded. “Where’s your supervisor?”

As if on queue, the supervisor emerged from the back of the store. He walked around to the front of the counter and confronted Henry. “My subordinate should not be subjected to such sub-optimal behavior from you. I submit to you, sir, that your sub sandwich meets all the standards of our sandwich shop. You must immediate cease this subjugation of my subordinate or I will require you to leave this Subway.

Henry hungrily eyed the sub sandwich. He was starving and, in a gesture of submission, he said, “Fine, I’ll take your substandard Subway sub sandwich.”

“It’s not substandard,” yelled the guy who had made the sandwich. “It’s a standard sub!”

This admittedly sub-par post was written for today’s one-word prompt, “substandard.”

21 thoughts on “Standard Sub

  1. Sight11 July 31, 2017 / 10:43 am

    My reader is acting weird. Out of nowhere it showed your post and than it is telling me you posted it 2 hrs. back.. Hmm.. Substandard Sandwich on a Subway.. I think it’s funny.. But today’s prompt was difficult wasn’t it.. It was subliminally sending out substandard messages. Wonder what’s all that about?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Emilio Pasquale July 31, 2017 / 11:18 am

    I think all Subway’s standard subs are sub standard! 😀


    Liked by 1 person

    • Fandango July 31, 2017 / 1:29 pm

      Thanks. Writing this put me in the mood for a foot-long sub. I hope it will be up to standards.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. newepicauthor July 31, 2017 / 2:18 pm

    I know that I have to pay more, but every time I go to Subway I order double meat and double cheese because they make their subs so chintzy (hey I could have used that for The Letter is C) or substandard. I love the way all of your characters are always so polite, even when they get mad at each other they still use the word sir.

    Liked by 2 people

      • Tricia September 1, 2017 / 6:09 pm

        Ooooooooooh! I love that film!!


    • Tricia September 1, 2017 / 6:11 pm

      I’m a hard-core Blimpie fan. I slum it with Subway because there aren’t many Blimpies around any more. I always end up rearranging my sandwich when I get home.


        • Tricia September 2, 2017 / 4:42 am

          Oh, sad for you. Have you experienced one?

          Liked by 1 person

          • Fandango September 2, 2017 / 7:49 am

            Yes, but that was back in college, which was decades ago.


  4. Tricia September 1, 2017 / 6:08 pm

    I’m quite impressed with your skills, Sensei. When’s class? Are you going to teach us all how to Get Away With Murdering Writing Challenges?


      • Tricia September 2, 2017 / 4:43 am

        Great. Do you take cash, credit, or barter?

        Liked by 1 person

        • Fandango September 2, 2017 / 7:50 am

          Hmm. Barter? What are you offering?


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